RoboCop 3 Blu-Ray Review

Rated PG-13 (Violence)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 45 Minutes

Cast:

Robert John Burke-Officer Alex J. Murphy/RoboCop

Nancy Allen-Officer Anne Lewis

John Castle-Commander Paul McDaggett

Jill Hennessy-Dr. Marie Lazarus

Remy Ryan-Nikko Halloran

Robert DoQui-Sergeant Warren Reed

C.C.H. Pounder-Bertha Washington

Rip Torn-OCP CEO

Felton Perry-OCP Vice President Donald Johnson

Bruce Locke-Otomo

Stanley Anderson-Zack

Daniel von Bargen-Moreno

Stephen Root-Coontz

Mako Iwamatsu-Kanemitsu CEO

Directed by Fred Dekker

They gave him a f*cking jet-pack?!

Note: Part of the "RoboCop Trilogy" Blu-Ray set.

When I was a kid, I used to have a RoboCop action figure. Pressing the little button on his chest would make his visor light up and you could also attach a jet-pack on him. The packaging had a strange blurb though, with a big red arrow inviting you to ‘just touch him.’ What does this story have to do with anything? Well, it’s to point out that “RoboCop 3” reduces our cyborg hero into a children’s plaything. Much of the biting satire and wit of Verhoeven’s original has now been lost and the bloody violence has been severely toned down to a kid-friendly PG-13. While it’s never boring, “RoboCop 3” is a mediocre, run-of-the-mill superhero flick, marking a sad end to one of the best action films of the 80’s.

On the verge of bankruptcy, OCP (Omni-Consumer Products) has been brought out by a Japanese company, the Kanemitsu Corporation. Still intent on making Delta City a reality, the new CEO (Rip Torn) creates an armed mercenary force called the Urban Rehabilitators or ‘Rehabs’ for short. Led by Commander Paul McDaggett (John Castle), the Rehabs begin forcibly removing people from their homes to make way for the demolition team. When RoboCop (Robert John Burke) and his partner, Anne Lewis (Nancy Allen), attempt to defend a group of civilians hiding out in a church, McDaggett kills Lewis and damages RoboCop with an M203 grenade launcher. Members of a ragtag resistance, led by Bertha Washington (C.C.H. Pounder) come to RoboCop’s assistance and spirit him away to an underground hideout. With his system efficiency dropping to dangerous levels, RoboCop asks his new allies to find Dr. Marie Lazarus (Jill Hennessy), who has the technical know-how to repair him. He also befriends a recently orphaned young girl named Nikko Halloran (Remy Ryan). In order to stop RoboCop from interfering with their plans, Kanemitsu’s CEO (Mako Iwamatsu) sends an elite Ninja assassin, Otomo (Bruce Locke).

Oh, how the mighty have fallen! “RoboCop 3” is a slightly more violent Saturday Morning Cartoon. Almost all of the witty satire has been stripped away and the trademark commercials and newscasts feel like an afterthought. One of the core themes of the previous installments was RoboCop struggling to regain his humanity even though he’s now more machine than man. This is only glossed over in a few throwaway scenes and then promptly forgotten. The main plot involves Old Detroit’s displaced citizens fighting back against OCP and their mercenary army, the Rehabs, a not-so-subtle metaphor for the Nazis. At least it’s more coherent plot-wise compared to the episodic feel of “RoboCop 2.” I’m surprised Frank Miller returned to write the script so I admire his perseverance to make it in Hollywood. Unfortunately, director Fred Dekker essentially guts the script to appeal to children. Dekker’s credits amount to a handful of forgettable B-movie horror flicks. Many aspects of the film feel silly or overly sentimental when compared to its more violent original. The streets are now plagued by a gang called the ‘Splatterpunks,’ who have bad teeth and look like a bunch of rejects from “Mad Max.” Whenever a good guy dies, the sad music swells to elicit emotion. Things take a turn for the ridiculous when RoboCop commandeers a pimp’s car! There’s certainly no shortage of action and explosions but since this is PG-13, no one ever gets shot and even if they do, there’s no blood or it all happens off-screen. In fact, I don’t think RoboCop even killed anyone in this film! In order to sell action figures, he has quite a few accessories now, including a removable arm gun and a jet-pack. I got a big laugh watching him zoom across the screen saving the oppressed citizens while Basil Poledouris’ heroic theme plays in the background. The special effects are primitive compared to the previous films and he looks like a cardboard cutout. It’s hard to take “RoboCop 3” seriously and the only way to enjoy the film is to treat it as an unintentional comedy.

Peter Weller was filming “Naked Lunch” with David Cronenberg at the time so he passed on reprising his role, though it’s not hard to assume that even he felt that there wasn’t much left to explore with RoboCop. Replacing him is Robert John Burke, who resembles Weller but fails to capture the nuances of his performance. He’s stuck with this permanent grimace during the entire film. Nancy Allen’s appearance feels like she was fulfilling a contractual obligation and her death scene feels forced. John Castle’s Commander Paul McDaggett is nothing more than a cartoon villain. The only thing missing is the evil mustache. The rest of the cast are forgettable but Jill Hennessy (from NBC’s “Crossing Jordan”) provides some nice eye candy.

“RoboCop 3” looks the best out of the trilogy box set on Blu-Ray with a cleaner image but color is subdued and lacks vibrancy, most likely due to the limited production budget. Like “RoboCop 2,” certain scenes appear fuzzy. Audio is somewhat of a step down though it’s still good, if workmanlike. Once more, the only extras included are the theatrical trailer.

Although initially set for a summer 1992 release, “RoboCop 3” languished on the shelf for a full year due to Orion Pictures going bankrupt. The film was finally released on November 5, 1993 to highly negative reviews and holds a 4% on Rotten Tomatoes. It failed to recoup its estimated $24 million production budget, earning $11 million at the domestic box office. RoboCop has always been an inherently silly character but even in my twenties, I still get a kick out of watching him. While “RoboCop 3” is terrible, I don’t feel it’s the abomination most fans make it out to be but that’s not exactly saying much, is it?

Final Rating: 2 out of 5

"My friends call me Murphy, you call me...RoboCop!"

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RoboCop 2 Blu-Ray Review

Rated R

Running Time: 1 Hour & 56 Minutes

Cast:

Peter Weller-Officer Alex J. Murphy/RoboCop

Nancy Allen-Officer Anne Lewis

Tom Noonan-Cain/RoboCop 2

Belinda Bauer-Dr. Juliette Faxx

Gabriel Damon-Hob

Galyn Görg-Angie

Felton Perry-OCP Vice President Donald Johnson

Daniel O'Herlihy-OCP CEO/The Old Man

Jeff McCarthy-Holzgang

Robert DoQui-Sergeant Warren Reed

Willard E. Pugh-Mayor Marvin Kuzak

Directed by Irvin Kershner

Guess who's back!

Note: Part of the "RoboCop Trilogy" Blu-Ray set.

Hollywood loves making sequels. Just look at this past summer’s offerings as a perfect example. After the critical and commercial success of the original “RoboCop,” Orion Pictures immediately approached Paul Verhoeven to do a sequel but he wasn’t ready to rush into it and preferred to wait for the right script. Impatient, Orion went ahead without him and hired famed comic book writer Frank Miller to do the script. Unfortunately, the producers and studio executives deemed Miller’s original screenplay as ‘unfilmable’ and it suffered through numerous rewrites. A less-than-stellar sequel, “RoboCop 2” delivers on some great action scenes but it never comes together as a satisfying whole with its patchy mess of a story.

Old Detroit is in total chaos as mega-corporation OCP (Omni-Consumer Products) forces a police strike by cutting off their pension plan and reducing salaries. Their goal is to let the city default on its debt so they can foreclose on it, allowing the company to take over the city’s government, demolish everything and build their planned ‘utopia,’ Delta City. Their Security Concepts division is also looking into developing a more advanced ‘RoboCop 2’ but each project ends in disaster as all the volunteers commit suicide upon realizing what they have become. An amoral and ambitious psychologist, Dr. Juliette Faxx (Belinda Bauer) convinces OCP’s CEO (Daniel O'Herlihy) to let her take over the project, promising to find a suitable candidate. Meanwhile, crime on the streets have gotten worse as people become addicted to a new designer drug called ‘Nuke,’ distributed by the fanatical and insane Cain (Tom Noonan), who his assisted by his girlfriend Angie (Galyn Görg) and a foul-mouth hoodlum named Hob (Gabriel Damon). With most of the police force on the picket fence, RoboCop (Peter Weller) and his partner, Anne Lewis (Nancy Allen), do what they can to keep order on the city streets. They eventually manage to rally all of the police officers and attack Cain’s hideout. Cain himself is severely injured during the gunfight but Angie and Hob manage to escape. Dr. Faxx sees Cain as the perfect candidate and harvests his brain for RoboCop 2. RoboCop is forced to battle this mechanical monstrosity when it goes on a drug-fueled rampage.

“RoboCop 2” retains the humorous commercials and ironically upbeat newscasts but Verhoeven’s absence is plainly felt throughout the film. The gleeful satirical edge just isn’t as sharp in this one. The story veers off into too many directions that RoboCop himself goes missing for much of the second hour. The first thirty minutes are promising as Murphy is still haunted by memories of his old life but is forced by OCP’s lawyers to acknowledge that he is nothing but a machine, despite his heart and mind thinking differently. Although Weller has little dialogue, you can see the despair on his face. Unfortunately, this subplot is dropped and is never explored again. Much of the running time is taken up by OCP once again up to their no-good shenanigans. Wanting the city to foreclose, they instigate a police strike to cause chaos on the streets, allowing OCP to build Delta City on the ruins of Old Detroit and control everything. They also want a 2.0 version of RoboCop but how Dr. Faxx sees Cain as perfect for the project makes no sense at all. She reasons it’s because he’s power-hungry and desires immortality but it’s really to have a giant cyborg-on-cyborg battle for the finale. The film takes a noticeably goofy turn when a rebuilt RoboCop is given hundreds of politically correct, non-offensive and non-violent directives, to the point where he can’t even defend himself and sprouts speeches about nutrition. Some of lines he utters are quite hysterical such as ‘Waste makes haste. For time is fleeting. A rolling stone is worth two in the bush.’ It’s a not-so-subtle jab at parental rights groups but it clashes with the ultra-violence on display. Although he is unable to refuse his new commands, it seems RoboCop retains enough free will to erase everything with a massive power surge. Hard to believe that OCP failed to implement some sort of safeguard like in the first film. The biggest issue I have is with the child character Hob, who curses and has no qualms about murdering police officers but he’s squeamish when it comes to watching Cain torturing people. Later, RoboCop takes pity on a dying Hob and the film has the gall to try and make us sympathize with him. I don’t care if he was a kid but I sure was glad Hob got his comeuppance. There’s just too much going on in “RoboCop 2” and none of the subplots are sufficiently explored, with some being dropped altogether. The only saving grace is the action and watching RoboCop taking down thugs without breaking a sweat always brings a smile to my face. Once he goes up against RoboCop 2, all the problems of the film fade away in a no-holds-barred battle. The stop-motion effects are quite impressive for its time, even if the movement is clunky and awkward. Unfortunately, it ends as quickly as it began but what an amazing 12 minutes of blood and explosions!

Due to the poorly constructed script, none of the cast proves memorable. Peter Weller’s best scenes occur in the first thirty minutes and for the rest of time all he does is kill bad guys. Although Murphy had regained his personality at the end of the first film, this is undone in the sequel. This would be the last time Weller would play RoboCop as he found it exhausting wearing the suit and filming the sequel was a disappointing experience for him due to several deleted scenes that would’ve fleshed out his character. Nancy Allen has little to do as well as Anne Lewis and she’s mostly along for the ride. Tom Noonan makes for a very poor villain as Cain. He’s missing that despicable quality that made Boddicker so memorable and resembles a Charles Manson reject. Surprisingly, Belinda Bauer is effective as Dr. Juliette Faxx, who uses every underhanded tactic to get ahead, which includes sleeping with the boss.

“RoboCop 2” on Blu-Ray is a massive improvement over the original in picture and audio quality. Although certain scenes appear fuzzy, textures are detailed and certain close-ups, especially on Murphy, look astounding. As much of the film is filled with explosions and gunfire, audio is louder, more dynamic and immersive, especially during the brawl between RoboCop and RoboCop 2. Occasionally, dialogue can sound murky but it’s rare. You’ll notice that Basil Poledouris iconic theme is missing as the score is done by Leonard Rosenman. The end credits music had a cheesy choir chanting ‘RoboCop! RoboCop!’ Again, there are no special features besides the two theatrical trailers.

Released on June 22, 1990, “RoboCop 2” received mixed to negative reviews with a current score of 35% on Rotten Tomatoes. The sequel was a moderate box office success with a domestic gross of $46 million against an estimated $14 million production budget. Despite its numerous flaws, “RoboCop 2” has its charms and the action is entertaining but Irvin Kershner (director of “The Empire Strikes Back”) never succeeds in capturing what made the original so unique. I guess the best praise I can muster is that when compared to 1993’s “RoboCop 3,” this one is like “Citizen Kane.”

Final Rating: 3 out of 5

"Patience, Lewis. We're only human!"

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RoboCop (1987) Unrated Director's Cut Blu-Ray Review

Unrated (Theatrical Version Rated R)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 43 Minutes

Cast:

Peter Weller-Officer Alex J. Murphy/RoboCop

Nancy Allen-Officer Anne Lewis

Ronny Cox-OCP Vice President Richard 'Dick' Jones

Kurtwood Smith-Clarence J. Boddicker

Miguel Ferrer-OCP Executive Robert 'Bob' Morton

Daniel O'Herlihy-OCP CEO/The Old Man

Robert DoQui-Sergeant Warren Reed

Ray Wise-Leon C. Nash

Paul McCrane-Emil M. Antonowsky

Jesse Goins-Joe P. Cox

Calvin Jung-Steve Minh

Directed by Paul Verhoeven

Dead or alive, you're coming with me!

Note: Part of the "RoboCop Trilogy" Blu-Ray set.

Sometimes when I get really bored, I hold my TV remote like it’s a gun and pretend I’m RoboCop. What, do you think that’s stupid? Well, I don’t care what you think! “RoboCop,” released 24 years ago in 1987 and directed by Paul Verhoeven, is another one of those films that I grew up with. Come to think of it, my mother let me watch way too many films that were wildly inappropriate for my age but I turned out fine. Originally a stand-alone Blu-Ray released in 2007, the film is now packaged with the other two installments as part of the “RoboCop Trilogy” box set. Despite a silly name and premise, “RoboCop” attacked and satirized American capitalism to gleeful effect in addition to providing plenty of explosions, making it one of the best action films ever made.

In a dystopian future, the city of Detroit, Michigan is teetering on the brink of collapse due to unchecked crime and financial ruin. Mega-corporation OCP (Omni-Consumer Products) privatizes the city’s police force, planning to destroy ‘Old Detroit’ and replace it with a supposed utopia called ‘Delta City.’ Unable to proceed due to rampant crime, the company looks into building a robotic replacement for law enforcement. Vice president Dick Jones (Ronny Cox) presents a large, bipedal robot named ED-209 in a board meeting but during the demonstration, an executive gets accidentally killed. Another executive, Bob Morton (Miguel Ferrer), reveals that he has a backup plan and is given the go-ahead to proceed by OCP’s CEO (Dan O'Herlihy). Meanwhile, Alex J. Murphy (Peter Weller) has joined the Metro-West precinct and with his partner Anne Lewis (Nancy Allen) chases a group of criminals led by Clarence J. Boddicker (Kurtwood Smith) to an abandoned steel mill. The two officers split up but when Lewis gets knocked out, Murphy is surrounded by Boddicker’s men, who brutally dismember him with shotguns before being shot point-blank in the head by Boddicker himself. He is pronounced dead by the hospital but OCP recovers his body’s remains and use him for Morton’s backup project, dubbed ‘RoboCop.’ Murphy’s memories are wiped and he is rebuilt as a powerful cyborg to clean up Detroit’s crime-ridden streets. His first patrol is a success but he soon begins suffering nightmares of his death and subconsciously remembers his wife and son. RoboCop must reconcile his human and machine counterparts while dealing with corrupt elements within OCP.

At first glance, “RoboCop” looks ridiculous but you should never judge a book by its cover. The film opens with a commercial about buying a mechanical heart replacement (extended warranties included!) and then a newscast depicting civil unrest around the world. A number of these would pop up throughout the film and it was Verhoeven’s way of poking fun at our capitalist society while exploring a dystopian future run by corporate politics. Other commercials had a family board game called ‘Nukem’ where the goal is to impose sanctions and force regime change until a player gives up and launches a nuke. Why, that sounds awfully similar to our situation with Iraq, except there were no nukes found. Finally, there’s the hilarious car commercial of the 6000 SUX, with its terrible gas mileage of 8.2 miles and yet everyone wants one! What’s surprising is that despite being made over two decades ago, “RoboCop” remains surprisingly relevant. OCP privatizes Detroit’s police force because the city government can no longer support it financially. Didn’t former president George W. Bush speak about privatizing Social Security at one point? Wasn’t the financial crisis, which we are still feeling the effects of, due to corporations being unchecked and unregulated? It’s like Verhoeven went to the future, came back and made this movie as a warning! Besides the social commentary, RoboCop himself takes on a Frankenstein aspect as he is literally a corpse remade. His subconscious memories of Murphy’s former life are his way of exploring human emotion. When he faces a hail of gunfire from OCP’s security force, it is reminiscent of Frankenstein being chased down by the townspeople. The film also goes over-the-top with the gore and it originally received an X-rating (this was before it was replaced with NC-17 in 1990) eleven times before the MPAA gave an R-rating. The scene with Murphy being shot at repeatedly might be hard to stomach for some as his whole arm gets blown apart. Some of the violence is presented tongue-in-cheek, such as when RoboCop encounters a rapist holding a woman hostage and he shoots between her legs, hitting his genitals. The one action scene that really takes me back is when RoboCop busts up a cocaine operation, guns down over 20 armed men with nothing but his modified Beretta and proceeds to beat the crap out of Boddicker. I absolutely felt giddy!

The acting won’t be winning any awards but the cast certainly do not phone it in. RoboCop is Peter Weller’s most memorable role and despite being covered in a cumbersome suit, he still allows Murphy’s humanity, his sense of honor, duty, and vengeance, to shine through. Wearing the suit wasn’t exactly a picnic as he lost up to 3 lbs. a day due to water loss, and eventually an air conditioner was installed inside. Nancy Allen is fine as his partner Ann Lewis. She was required to cut her hair as Verhoeven wanted to desexualize her character. Kurtwood Smith (Eric Foreman’s Dad!) does an incredible job making Clarence J. Boddicker as despicable as possible and when he gets his comeuppance, I practically cheered! Finally, there’s Ronny Cox as corrupt OCP vice president Dick Jones, who represents the worst aspects of corporate politics, literally eliminating his competition and valuing profit above all else. He would feel right at home at Weyland-Yutani.

As part of the “RoboCop Trilogy” box set, this release is virtually the same as the 2007 release. Picture quality is a mixed bag with certain scenes looking sharp but others are marred by excessive grain. The increased resolution also reveals the aged special effects with the obvious stop-motion of ED-209 and the literal rag-doll effect as Jones falls to his death at the end of the film. Audio is impressive as we’re treated to loud explosions and gunfire but at times they drown out Basil Poledouris’ excellent score and it lacks that sense of clarity in modern films. This is bare-bones release so there are no special features besides the trailer, which is really disappointing.

“RoboCop” was released on July 17, 1987 and received positive reviews with 88% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics found it ‘over-the-top and gory, [but] is also a surprisingly smart sci-fi flick that uses ultra-violence to disguise its satire of American culture.’ A box office success, earning $53 million domestically against a $13 million production budget, Orion Pictures immediately approached Verhoeven and the writers to make a sequel but he wanted to wait for a proper script. Typical of Hollywood, the studio went ahead without him and the next two sequels only served to sully the reputation of this film…but that is another story for another day. “RoboCop” introduces one of the most iconic characters of the 80’s and what made it a great film was that it had something meaningful to say in addition to all the action on display. They sure don’t make action movies like they used to!

Final Rating: 4.5 out of 5

"Come quietly or there will be...trouble!"

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Red Special Edition Blu-Ray Review

Rated PG-13 (Intense Sequences of Action Violence and Brief Strong Language)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 51 Minutes

Cast:

Bruce Willis-Frank Moses

Mary-Louise Parker-Sarah Ross

John Malkovich-Marvin Boggs

Helen Mirren-Victoria

Morgan Freeman-Joe Matheson

Brian Cox-Ivan Simanov

Karl Urban-CIA Agent William Cooper

Richard Dreyfuss-Alexander Dunning

Julian McMahon-Vice President Robert Stanton

Rebecca Pidgeon-Cynthia Wilkes

Ernest Borgnine-Henry, The Records Keeper

James Remar-Gabriel Singer

Directed by Robert Schwentke

A warehouse...it always ends in a warehouse.

Helen Mirren wielding a submachine gun while mowing down a group of Secret Service agents isn’t something that we see every day. Loosely based upon the DC Comics/Wildstorm limited series of the same name created by writer Warren Ellis and artist Cully Hamner, “Red” is a lot better film than it should be thanks to its all-star ensemble cast. While there’s certainly room for improvement, the fun of watching these respected thespians gleefully shooting up hordes of bad guys in style makes “Red” worth a look.

Frank Moses (Bruce Willis) is a former CIA black ops agent who is now living a quiet, yet dull, life of retirement. He frequently rips up his pension checks as an excuse to ‘phone call-flirt’ with a customer service representative named Sarah Ross (Mary-Louise Parker). While asleep one night, Frank wakes up to find a hit squad infiltrating his home and makes short work of them despite being armed with nothing but a handgun. He makes his way to Kansas City to protect Sarah knowing that his phone lines have been tapped. She reluctantly goes along after some resistance and Frank gathers up the rest of his old team, which includes Joe Matheson (Morgan Freeman), Marvin Boggs (John Malkovich), Ivan Simanov (Brian Cox) and Victoria (Helen Mirren), to find out who is trying to kill him. Meanwhile, he is being pursued by a young and ambitious CIA agent named William Cooper (Karl Urban).

You ever wonder what would happen if your favorite secret agents like James Bond or Jack Bauer were in their twilight years and forced to come out of retirement for one final mission? If “Red” is any indication, these people would still be whupping ass despite drinking Metamucil. 2010 saw the release of a number of ‘men-on-a-mission’ movies such as “The Losers” (also a comic book adaptation), “The A-Team,” and “The Expendables.” While “Red” still deals with the same tropes such as a black ops team forced to become fugitives and secret government conspiracies, what makes it a better film is the A-list cast that has been assembled or else this would’ve been a passably entertaining flick. There are a few glaring flaws with the pacing being on the slow side in the first hour as all the characters are introduced and then it rushes toward its climax in the second. The action isn’t particularly memorable nor is it realistic but there are some standouts including a big fist fight between Moses and Cooper at the CIA headquarters, Boggs shooting down an RPG with one bullet, and the novelty of seeing Mirren mow down bad guys using a large machine gun turret! Much of the comedy is derived from the eccentric and obsessively paranoid Boggs but nothing is really laugh-out-loud hilarious. With the exception of its cast, “Red” is just average yet also a fun, often time’s silly, action movie.

Bruce Willis isn’t a stranger to films of this type and he’s still engaging to watch as the soft-spoken yet deadly Frank Moses. The title is actually an acronym for “Retired, Extremely Dangerous.” Mary-Louise Parker is Sarah Ross, a customer service representative who handles Frank’s pension checks and flirts with him on the phone to get through her dull work routine. At first terrified, she eventually enjoys the adventure of it all but her screen-time gets reduced as more characters start popping up. John Malkovich is just crazy as he leaps out of the bushes in a guile suit while wielding a crossbow (does it shoot explosive bolts?!), carries a stuffed toy pig which happens to have a grenade launcher and pulling a gun on an innocent bank teller. His instincts prove correct when that same bank teller shows up again dressed like Rambo and insults him for being old. During an interrogation, he pulls out a series of torture devices and asks his friends to choose: ‘nuts, nipples, or potty trainer?’ Helen Mirren brings some extra class to the proceedings as a former MI6 agent turned contract killer with Brian Cox as her lover. Unfortunately, Morgan Freeman disappoints as his role is very limited and not as large as the initial trailers made it out to be. Karl Urban is playing the straight role as an up-and-comer CIA agent. The rest of the cast includes Richard Dreyfuss as Alexander Dunning, Julian McMahon as Vice President Robert Stanton and Rebecca Pidgeon as Cooper’s amoral handler Cynthia Wilkes.

The picture and audio quality for the Blu-Ray is excellent. Flesh tones lean toward an orange hue but the color is often vibrant and textures are detailed. From small ambient noises to loud assault rifle fire, “Red” engages the senses like no other. Despite bearing a ‘Special Edition’ on the box, the extras aren’t all that expansive but they include an audio commentary from former CIA agent Robert Baer who served as a consultant and an informative picture-in-picture which includes cast interviews and a behind-the-scenes look at how the film was made. The rest is just the usual deleted/extended scenes fluff.

“Red” was released on October 15, 2010 and received positive reviews with 70% on Rotten Tomatoes. The film was also nominated for a Golden Globe in the Best Picture—Musical or Comedy category but lost to “The Kids Are All Right.” Critics admitted it wasn’t ‘the killer thrill ride you'd expect from an action movie with a cast of this caliber, but Red still thoroughly outshines most of its big-budget counterparts with its wit and style.’ Going up against the idiotic “Jackass 3D,” the film came in at #2 at the box office and grossed $165 million worldwide against a $58 million production budget. “Red” never takes itself too seriously with its outlandish situations and while the action and comedy elements are average, the cast fully invest themselves in their roles, and their fun repartee makes the film a cut above average.

Final Rating: 3.5 out of 5

"Frank, I never thought I'd say this again. I'm getting the PIG!"

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007 Die Another Day Review

Rated PG-13 (Intense Sequences of Action Violence, and Sexual Content including Innuendo)

Running Time: 2 Hours & 12 Minutes

Cast-

Pierce Brosnan-007, James Bond

Halle Berry-Giacinta 'Jinx' Johnson

Toby Stephens-Gustav Graves

Rosamund Pike-Miranda Frost

Rick Yune-Zao

Judi Dench- M

John Cleese-Q

Samantha Bond-Miss Jane Moneypenny

Colin Salmon-Charles Robinson

Michael Madsen-Damian Falco

Will Yun Lee-Colonel Tan-Sun Moon

Kenneth Tsang-General Moon

Emilio Echevarría-Raoul

Lawrence Makoare-Mr. Kil

Rachel Grant-Peaceful Fountains of Desire

Madonna-Verity

Directed by Lee Tamahori 

Pierce Brosnan remains in top form as James Bond but "Die Another Day" represents the franchise's worse aspects.

I may prefer Daniel Craig but Pierce Brosnan was an excellent James Bond, which makes his fourth and final outing in the role all the more disheartening. “Die Another Day,” released in 2002, is the twentieth Bond film and to mark the series’ fortieth anniversary, it included references to the previous nineteen installments. Unfortunately, the film’s heavy reliance on loud action, dodgy CGI, and excessive gadgets turned Bond into a poor parody of himself. With a formulaic and outlandish plot to appeal to younger audiences, “Die Another Day” marks the lowest point in this storied franchise.

007, James Bond (Pierce Brosnan) infiltrates a North Korean military base led by Colonel Tan-Sun Moon (Will Yun Lee), who sells weapons in exchange for African conflict diamonds. Bond’s cover is blown when someone within MI6 informs Moon’s comrade-in-arms, Zao (Rick Yune), of his true identity and a firefight ensues. Moon is killed when his hovercraft runs off a waterfall but Bond is captured by his father, General Moon (Kenneth Tsang). For fourteen months, Bond is imprisoned and tortured for information but eventually he is released in a prisoner exchange for Zao, who has now become a terrorist. His 00-status revoked, Bond goes rogue to find out who betrayed him and his investigation takes him to Havana, Cuba, where he meets the beautiful Giacinta ‘Jinx’ Johnson (Halle Berry). After a night of passion, Bond tracks Zao to a gene therapy clinic but he escapes during the confusion, leaving behind a necklace containing diamonds bearing the mark of Gustav Graves (Toby Stephens), a wealthy British entrepreneur. Graves is planning to unveil a satellite code-named Icarus in Iceland and while there, Bond runs into Jinx once more, who is revealed to be an NSA agent when she is captured by Zao. Bond rescues her and discovers that Graves plans to harness the power of the sun through Icarus for world domination.

Before “Casino Royale,” Bond films have always been ridiculous in its plots and offered weak character development but “Die Another Day” takes the cake. The film initially shows promise with Bond imprisoned and tortured, which is something new but it then devolves into the franchise’s worst aspects. Graves uses a mirrored satellite that shoots a giant beam of sunlight in order to detonate the one thousand landmines strewn across the demilitarized zone to allow the North Koreans to attack the South. Now, that scenario is sound (if needlessly complicated) but the execution is awful and turns this Bond film into bad science-fiction. Much of its running time is padded by action scenes which seem to grow louder and dumber. Still, they are enjoyable but it turns Bond into a generic action hero. One has him racing across the ice to escape the satellite’s concentrated beam and when he falls over the edge, Bond uses a makeshift surfboard and parasails across the resulting waves. Unfortunately, this entire sequence is CG and it's poorly done. When it cuts to Bond up-close, the green-screen is painfully obvious. As if that wasn’t enough, Bond gets into his Aston Martin (now equipped with a cloaking device!) and engages in a chase with Zao, whose car comes with a mini-gun attached in the trunk. I wonder if that accessory will come with my first car. Many explosions occur and I kept thinking how it was possible to even fit a driver’s seat with all the rockets and grenades stowed on each of their decked-out cars. For the record, the cloaking effect for Bond’s car is terrible as well. This all leads to big climax where Bond fights hand-to-hand with Graves, who is wearing a corny mech suit that controls his satellite. All that was missing is a jet-pack! To add that ‘cool-factor,’ the camera often goes into slow-motion but it’s just annoying. The action will come off as enjoyable in any other generic action film but for “Die Another Day,” it’s just excessive and turns Bond into a caricature of himself.

Pierce Brosnan is still at the top of his game and is one of the film’s few saving graces. As Jinx, Halle Berry makes a memorable entrance that pays homage to Ursula Andress’ Honey Ryder from the first Bond film, “Dr. No.” However, her line readings sound confused and she always looks unsure of what to do during the action scenes. Rosamund Pike fares a lot better as the cold-hearted Miranda Frost. Toby Stephens smirks and revels in his evilness, which adds to the cartoon aspect of the film and his henchman Zao, played by Rick Yune, is like any other disfigured Bond villain. He even wears a trench coat to let you know he’s bad! The opening theme is hard to sit through as it’s sung by Madonna. Now I have no problem with her but it’s a pop song that belongs in an album for fourteen-year-old girls. It has no business being in a Bond film. She even has a cameo in the film where she shows off her ‘amazing’ acting talent. Fortunately, David Arnold’s score is fine and serves as a reminder that we’re still watching a Bond film.

“Die Another Day” was released on November 22, 2002 and received mixed reviews with 57% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics found it was ‘pure formula, but it has some nifty elements.’ It continued the trend of having higher box office grosses with $431.9 million worldwide. The problem with this film is that it panders to the ADD generation by going overboard with the action and the gadgets, losing the core essence of what Bond was about. Fortunately, the producers seemed to have realized this and when Bond returned, he was back in a way no one expected and for the better, as 2006’s “Casino Royale” abandoned all of the franchise’s crazy elements. As an action film, it’s okay but as a Bond film, “Die Another Day” is mediocre. The formula is still the same but the method seems to get more ludicrous. Watch it for the sake of completion, nothing more.

Final Rating: 2.5 out of 5

"You see Mr. Bond, you can't kill my dreams. But my dreams can kill you. Time to face destiny!"

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007 The World Is Not Enough Review

Rated PG-13 (Intense Sequences of Action Violence, Some Sexuality and Innuendo)

Running Time: 2 Hours & 8 Minutes

Cast-

Pierce Brosnan-007, James Bond

Sophie Marceau-Elektra King

Denise Richards-Dr. Christmas Jones

Robert Carlyle-Viktor Zokas/Renard

Judi Dench-M

Desmond Llewelyn-Q

John Cleese-R

Samantha Bond-Miss Jane Moneypenny

Michael Kitchen-Bill Tanner

Robbie Coltrane-Valentin Dmitrovich Zukovsky

Colin Salmon-Charles Robinson

Ulrich Thomsen-Sasha Davidov

David Calder-Sir Robert King

Clifford Joseph Price-Mr. Bullion

Maria Grazia Cucinotta-Giulietta da Vinci

Directed by Michael Apted

Women and their contraptions!

1995’s “GoldenEye” successfully revitalized James Bond but with Pierce Brosnan’s third outing in 1999’s “The World Is Not Enough,” the franchise once again descended into formula. With no new creative direction to take the character, the film is an average Bond flick that suffered from a weak plot, poor casting, and an overabundance of action. There’s still fun to be had but its business as usual.

007, James Bond (Pierce Brosnan) is at Bilbao, Spain retrieving a large sum of money from a Swiss bank for a personal friend of M’s (Judi Dench), an oil tycoon named Sir Robert King (David Calder). However, when Bond presses the banker about what happened to his partner, the assistant kills him before he can reveal any information. Bond takes the money back to MI6 in London but when King collects it, he is killed as the bills had been laced with an explosive compound. The banker’s assistant was the one that detonated the bomb and Bond chases her on an armored, rocket-fueled speedboat through the Thames. She tries to escape on a hot air balloon but Bond latches on, pleading with her to cooperate and promising protection. The assassin refuses and commits suicide by shooting out the helium tanks, therefore blowing up the balloon. M vows that whoever is behind the bombing will be brought to justice and the money is traced to a former KGB agent-turned-terrorist named Viktor Zokas, otherwise known as Renard (Robert Carlyle). He once held King’s daughter, Elektra (Sophie Marceau), for ransom and Bond is assigned to protect her as she is suspected to be the next target. He later tracks Renard to an ICBM base in Kazakhstan but Bond is unable to prevent his escape and stealing recovered weapons-grade plutonium from a nuclear bomb. The base is destroyed and Bond escapes with a nuclear physicist, Dr. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards), in tow. However, it turns out that Elektra may not be as innocent as she claims and when M is kidnapped, Bond has to do everything in his power to save her and the world’s oil supply.

“The World Is Not Enough” deals with the usual Bond tropes but there are some subtle changes. The tone is noticeably darker and in a nice change of pace, the primary villain is a woman. The final confrontation is shocking to say the least and Brosnan here is more in tune with how Fleming wrote Bond originally. Renard, however, comes off as a second-rate thug. He has a bullet lodged in his brain that is slowly killing him and dulled all his senses, making him an unfeeling killing machine but by the time he goes up against Bond, he is beaten way too easily. The story feels padded by a number of overlong action scenes, which are still thrilling but at times require too much suspension of disbelief. The opening boat chase through the Thames is the most memorable set-piece while another has Bond going up against Renard’s henchmen on parachuting snowmobiles but the most ridiculous involves a helicopter with a giant saw-blade attached. Here, Bond almost seems superhuman as everything gets shot up and explodes around him, and he escapes with nary a scratch. As always, the film takes place in a variety of locales but Azerbaijan and Kazakhstan seem like any other generic barren landscape. Gadgets include a watch that can shoot a grappling hook, x-ray vision sunglasses, and a winter coat that can turn into an inflatable cocoon tent. There’s not much to be said about “The World Is Not Enough,” it’s got everything you need for a Bond film, nothing more and nothing less but this strict adherence to formula has begun to grow stale.

Pierce Brosnan fills into James Bond’s shoes like an old glove and he’s still enjoyable to watch. However, the biggest problem I (and the fans) have is Denise Richards as Christmas Jones. She’s playing a nuclear physicist, which is hard to swallow with her tank top and short shorts. That's like having Megan Fox play a college professor! Every line of dialogue Richards utters feels stiff, as if she’s unsure of what she’s saying. Due to her casting, this was the first Bond film to win a Golden Raspberry for Worst Supporting Actress. Sophie Marceau fares much better with her exotic look, seductive eyes and sexy accent. Robert Carlyle is criminally underutilized as Renard and that’s a shame, because he had the potential to be a memorable Bond villain. Judi Dench plays a larger role as M; Desmond Llewelyn makes his final appearance as Q before his untimely death in a car accident with John Cleese as his protégé, R. The theme song, written by David Arnold and Don Black and performed by Shirley Manson of the alternative rock band Garbage ranks as one of the best, although I wasn’t feeling the oil theme with the opening credits. Arnold’s score is also a great listen with liberal use of the Bond theme playing throughout.

 “The World Is Not Enough” was released on November 19, 1999 and received mixed reviews with 51% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics felt the film ‘focuses a little too much on action, with a plot too weak for the movie's length.’ It became the highest grossing Bond film at the time, with $361.8 million at the worldwide box office so audiences didn’t seem tired of watching the same old formula. “The World Is Not Enough” is neither bad nor good and is somewhere in the middle. Brosnan is still engaging to watch but the first signs of franchise fatigue is beginning to show and ‘business as usual’ can only take Bond so far.

Final Rating: 3 out of 5

"There's no point living, if you can't feel alive."

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007 Tomorrow Never Dies Review

Rated PG-13 (Intense Sequences of Action Violence, Sexuality and Innuendo)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 59 Minutes

Cast-

Pierce Brosnan-007, James Bond

Jonathan Pryce-Elliot Carver

Michelle Yeoh-Colonel Wai Lin

Teri Hatcher-Paris Carver

Judi Dench-M

Desmond Llewelyn-Q

Samantha Bond-Miss Jane Moneypenny

Colin Salmon-Chief of Staff Charles Robinson

Joe Don Baker-Jack Wade

Götz Otto-Richard Stamper

Ricky Jay-Henry Gupta

Vincent Schiavelli-Dr. Kaufman

Geoffrey Palmer-Admiral Roebuck

Julian Fellowes-Minister of Defense

Directed by Roger Spottiswoode

Pierce Brosnan and Michelle Yeoh proved to be a strong pairing in "Tomorrow Never Dies."

Thanks to director Martin Campbell and Pierce Brosnan, 1995’s “GoldenEye” made James Bond relevant once more, injecting some much needed life back into this venerable franchise. Unfortunately, the producers didn’t keep up the momentum and it was back to business as usual with “Tomorrow Never Dies,” the eighteenth Bond film released in 1997. The action is loud and the villains are evil but the film is let down by a rushed script and a ridiculous premise.

007, James Bond (Pierce Brosnan) is infiltrating a terrorist arms bazaar on the Russian border with M (Judi Dench) and Charles Robinson (Colin Salmon) providing communications support. Before he can finish his reconnaissance British Admiral Roebuck (Geoffrey Palmer) orders a missile launch to take out all the terrorists in one strike. Bond discovers Soviet nuclear warheads mounted on two L-39 Albatros fighter jets, which would cause untold radioactive contamination if destroyed. With the missile launch unable to be aborted, Bond hijacks the jet and escapes just before everything is blown up. Unbeknownst to him, one of the terrorists has escaped with a GPS encoder made by the American military. Elsewhere, a stealth ship sinks the HMS Devonshire off the coast of China and shoots down a Chinese J-7 fighter jet sent in to investigate. MI6 suspects media mogul Elliot Carver (Jonathan Pryce), head of CMGN, as behind the attack and Bond is sent to Hamburg, Germany to investigate. He seduces Carver’s wife Paris (Teri Hatcher), who happens to be an ex-girlfriend, for information and manages to steal back the GPS encoder at CMGN’s newspaper headquarters. During the ensuing gun fight, Bond crosses paths with a Chinese agent named Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh). Together, they discover that Carver wants to dominate the world’s media by instigating a war between the United Kingdom and China.

“Tomorrow Never Dies” does not deviate from the usual Bond formula but there are a few wrinkles, especially with the villain, Elliot Carver. He’s still a megalomaniac but instead of world domination, he wants to have…higher ratings. Since China refused to grant exclusive broadcasting rights to his media company CMGN, he intends to make up the news by sparking World War III! Honestly, it’s ludicrous, even for a Bond film, and comes dangerously close to rivaling 2002’s “Die Another Day” in absurdity. All that was missing is a satellite shooting giant beams of sunlight. There’s a weak attempt to explore Bond’s loneliness and how he keeps all the women he sleeps with from getting too close but eventually this is pushed aside in favor of the action. Despite the abundance of explosions and gunfire, I found the action scenes strangely lacking. As always, Q grants Bond a new car, a BMW 750i, equipped with rockets and can be remote-controlled through a touchpad cell-phone. Later, Bond and Wai Lin find themselves captured by Carver at his Saigon headquarters (actually filmed in Thailand) and escapes by leaping off the roof while holding onto a large banner. A big chase ensues with them on a motorcycle with a pursuing helicopter, explosively brought down when a clothesline gets caught in one of the rotors. The script was subject to numerous rewrites and was originally set during the July 1997 transfer of Hong Kong from British to Chinese rule. This was dropped in order to avoid a ‘life imitating art’ fiasco and rewrites continued even as filming began in January, 1997. Surprisingly, it all ends up coherent, if a little paper-thin. Although it rarely breaks any new ground, “Tomorrow Never Dies” remains an enjoyable affair.

Pierce Brosnan settles in comfortably into his role as James Bond, charming with the women but cold-hearted with the villains. Played by Hong Kong action star Michelle Yeoh, Wai Lin is a nice change of pace from other Bond girls. She’s not a helpless damsel-in-distress and being a secret agent herself, can more than hold her own against a group of bad guys. Yeoh and Brosnan have great chemistry and have an enjoyable repartee. Lin is also one of the few Bond girls who do not sleep with Bond, at least not until the very end right before the end credits roll. Unfortunately, Teri Hatcher disappoints and even admits she wasn’t happy with her role. Jonathan Pryce goes way over-the-top as insane media mogul Elliot Carver, a not-so-subtle satire of Rupert Murdoch. He would feel quite at home in a 60’s comic book. Götz Otto is Carver’s right-hand man Richard Stamper, who is the very definition of Übermensch. Bond stabs him multiple times and it doesn’t even slow him down. This time the theme song is sung by Sheryl Crow but it’s very low-key and lacks a feeling of grandeur. I wasn’t enamored with the opening credits which had women covered in circuitry and television screens hovering around. David Arnold also begins his long relationship with the Bond franchise, taking over the score and he does not disappoint, making liberal use of the Bond theme.

“Tomorrow Never Dies” was released on December 19, 1997, going up against James Cameron’s “Titanic.” As a result, it didn’t open at number one at the domestic box office and had a lower worldwide gross with $333 million, which is still impressive. Reviews were mixed with 57% on Rotten Tomatoes. After “GoldenEye,” Brosnan’s run as Bond in the next three installments devolved into formula and loud action, which is a shame since the actor was handicapped by less-than-stellar scripts. Still, ridiculous premise aside, “Tomorrow Never Dies” is an enjoyable if unremarkable entry.

Final Rating: 3 out of 5

"The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success!"

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007 GoldenEye Review

Rated PG-13 (A Number of Sequences of Action/Violence, and for Some Sexuality)

Running Time: 2 Hours & 10 Minutes

Cast-

Pierce Brosnan-007, James Bond

Sean Bean-006, Alec Trevelyan

Izabella Scorupco-Natalya Simonova

Famke Janssen-Xenia Onatopp

Judi Dench-M

Desmond Llewelyn-Q

Joe Don Baker-Jack Wade

Gottfried John-General Arkady Grigorovich Ourumov

Alan Cumming-Boris Grishenko

Robbie Coltrane-Valentin Dmitrovich Zukovsky

Tchéky Karyo-Defense Minister Dmitri Mishkin

Samantha Bond- Miss Jane Moneypenny

Michael Kitchen-Bill Tanner

Directed by Martin Campbell

"She always did enjoy a good squeeze."

With MGM finally emerging from bankruptcy in late December, 2010, pre-production has finally resumed on “Bond 23,” set to be released on November 9, 2012 with Daniel Craig returning as 007, James Bond. As a way to celebrate, I decided to take look back on the Pierce Brosnan era, starting with his first appearance as Bond in 1995’s “GoldenEye,” the film that introduced me to Ian Fleming’s titular spy. The James Bond franchise has remained as one of the few longest continually running film series in cinema history, having been in constant production for the most part since 1962 with a total of twenty-two films released; the last one was 2008’s “Quantum of Solace.” The sixteenth Bond film, 1989’s “License to Kill”—and the last to star Timothy Dalton—flopped at the domestic box office with only $35 million, barely covering its $32 million production budget, though it did better overseas with an additional $122 million. Although it received generally positive reviews, moviegoers were turned off by the darker, more realistic tone and perhaps it was just too soon to go this route until the series was rebooted with “Casino Royale” in 2006. While Dalton was set to return for a third film, he quit the role in 1994 due to the ongoing legal dispute between MGM/UA, which was sold to Australian broadcasting group Quintex, and Danjaq, the Swiss-based parent company of EON Productions. Pierce Brosnan was cast to replace Dalton and the media made a huge fuss, proclaiming that he was ‘born to be Bond.’ Six years after “Bond 16,” production finally began on the seventeenth film and it modernized the character in the wake of the Cold War. The changes largely proved cosmetic as the formula remained unchanged but “GoldenEye” was still an excellent revitalization of an aging franchise thanks to Martin Campbell’s confident direction, and Brosnan’s suave and charismatic performance.

In 1985, MI6 agents 006, Alec Trevelyan (Sean Bean) and 007, James Bond (Pierce Brosnan) infiltrate a Soviet chemical weapons facility at Arkhangelsk. During their attempt to destroy the base, Alec is captured and shot dead by Colonel Arkady Ourumov (Gottfried John) but Bond manages to steal an airplane and escape. Nine years later, Bond is following Xenia Onatopp (Famke Janssen), a suspected member of the Janus crime syndicate. Onatopp is working with Ourumov, now a General, and together they steal a prototype helicopter that is immune to electromagnetic pulses. They fly to a bunker in Severnaya, where they massacre the staff and steal the control disc to a dual satellite weapons system dubbed ‘GoldenEye,’ which detonates a nuclear weapon in orbit and the resulting EMP knocks out all electronic devices on the ground. One is activated to destroy the complex but unbeknownst to them, a lone survivor, Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco), manages to escape. M (Judi Dench) sends Bond to investigate, who discovers that the head of Janus is an old friend, seemingly back from the dead.

For the most part, the plot of “GoldenEye” is standard Bond fare but Campbell sure does a great job in making it all seem fresh and exciting at the time of its release. The character itself was so closely associated with the Cold War that critics felt that it was better to leave Bond in the past but one thing you can always count on in life (besides death and taxes) is that he always returns. There’s a heavy dose of action with a large shootout in the first ten minutes, leading to a thrilling escape involving Bond riding a motorcycle off a cliff and diving toward an unmanned airplane. The most memorable set-piece is when Bond steals a T-54/55 series tank and plows through the streets of St. Petersburg, causing untold amounts of property damage while the famous theme plays. When two police cars crash into him, he looks back to see if the officers are okay, adjusts his tie, and continues on his way. There’s the usual amount of gadgets, though it's thankfully nowhere near as outlandish as the later installments. They include a watch equipped with a cutting laser, a ballpoint pen that detonates after three clicks, and a belt that doubles as a grappling gun. The most disappointing aspect is that the script could’ve explored Bond’s internal conflict with having to kill his former best friend and while we get the feeling that he harbors regrets, nothing is ever made of it. The more things change, the more they stay the same and that’s the best way to describe “GoldenEye,” a successful modernization but with an unchanged formula. Still, the one-liners come fast, the Bond Girls are gorgeous, and the action scenes are expertly choreographed, making the film a fun ride.

Pierce Brosnan completely nails the role in his first outing as James Bond, displaying a confident, charismatic wit with a hint of vulnerability. When Onatopp gets crushed in-between two tree branches, he quips, ‘She always did enjoy a good squeeze.’ Famke Janssen is sexy as the sadomasochistic Xenia Onatopp, who has a penchant for killing people by crushing the life out of them between her strong thighs while screaming in orgasm. In contrast Izabella Scorupco’s Natalya Simonova plays a more homely Bond Girl who seems to enjoy being bossy but for the most part, ends up doing very little. As the main villain Alec Trevelyan, Sean Bean plays him as a dark mirror of Bond, without the moral center and fueled by petty revenge and greed. The rest of the cast includes Judi Dench as M, Desmond Llewelyn as the gadget-making Q and Samantha Bond as the flirtatious Miss Jane Moneypenny. The theme song, titled after the film, is sung by Tina Turner with the surreal opening credits depicting the fall of the Soviet Union.

Released on November 17, 1995, “GoldenEye” received largely positive reviews with 82% on Rotten Tomatoes, although the film does have its fair share of detractors who found that despite the new coat of paint, the series still seemed stale and tired. Bond had an explosive comeback at the box office after a six-year hiatus, earning $352.2 million worldwide, proving that Bond was still a relevant character in an increasingly changing world. With “GoldenEye,” Campbell successfully mixes everything you would expect from a Bond film: humor, exotic locales, gorgeous ladies, and stunning action in the name of fun, reintroducing him to old fans that had grown tired of him and gaining new ones. This is simply one of the best Bond films made.

Final Rating: 4.5 out of 5

"Good, because I think you're a sexist, misogynist dinosaur. A relic of the Cold War, whose boyish charms, though wasted on me, obviously appealed to that young woman I sent out to evaluate you."

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