After Earth Review

Rated PG-13 (Sci-Fi Action Violence and Some Disturbing Images)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 40 Minutes

Cast-

Will Smith-Cypher Raige

Jaden Smith-Kitai Raige

Sophie Okonedo-Faia Raige

Zoë Isabella Kravitz-Senshi Raige

Glenn Morshower-Commander Velan

David Denman-Private McQuarrie

Sacha Dhawan-Hesper Pilot

Chris Geere-Hesper Navigator

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan

Jaden Smith stars in "After Earth," the first of summer 2013's box office flops.

Note: I missed the advance screening so I'm making up for it now.

A few days ago, fifteen-year-old Jaden Smith decided to go on a little anti-education rant and encouraged his 4.6 million followers on Twitter to drop out of school because according to him, it was a 'tool to brainwash the youth.' Considering how badly "After Earth" flopped both critically and financially, the last thing Jaden should be doing is give advice regarding one's educational pursuits. Released back in May, the sci-fi action/adventure film was conceived from the ground up by Jaden's father, megastar Will Smith, but why the hell did he pick M. Night Shyamalan to direct?! Did the actor not see 2008's "The Happening" (the one where Mark Wahlberg started talking to plastic trees) and 2010's horrid adaptation of "The Last Airbender"? The sight of Shyamalan's name emblazoned on a movie poster used to be a guaranteed sign of quality but then came 2004's "The Village," a creepy yet ultimately misguided drama/psychological thriller about a group of people who willingly sealed themselves off from the modern world. Each successive film that followed grew progressively worse and it's gotten to the point where Columbia Pictures has to deliberately hide the director's name while marketing "After Earth." Given all the bad press that Shyamalan has received in the past seven years, I'm frankly amazed that he's still getting work on big-budget studio projects. For fans still holding out hope that "The Sixth Sense" director will eventually regain his mojo, you might as well move on because "After Earth" is a disaster from start to finish, a tediously dull and plodding piece of science fiction that's let down by unengaging performances and self-indulgent, soapbox sermonizing.

A thousand years ago, an environmental cataclysm forced humanity to abandon their home planet of Earth and take to the stars. The survivors eventually settled on an arid world they dubbed 'Nova Prime' but a hostile alien species, the S'krell, was in the process of conquering the planet. They unleashed a race of monstrous predators called 'Ursas' to hunt the humans toward extinction, using their uncanny ability to sense fear to locate their prey. Hope arrived in the form of the United Ranger Corps, whose prime commander, Cypher Raige (Will Smith), developed the ability to suppress his fear and literally become invisible to the Ursas. This technique was called 'ghosting.' Cypher's thirteen-year-old son, Kitai (Jaden Smith) aspires to be a ranger like his father but fails to advance to the next level when his instructor reveals that he collapses under pressure. Encouraged by his wife Faia (Sophie Okonedo), Cypher decides to take his son along on his last mission in an effort to bond. However, their spacecraft runs into an asteroid shower and crash-lands on a nearby planet. With both of his legs broken, Cypher instructs his son to retrieve a distress beacon from the other half of the ship, 100 kilometers away. He reveals to Kitai that the planet they're on is Earth, and that every animal has evolved to kill humans.

'What is up with the weird accents?' That was the first thought running through my mind during Kitai Raige's opening narration in "After Earth." Not only is it distracting and off-putting to listen to, but it forces the actors to awkwardly enunciate every word while sounding like HAL from "2001: A Space Odyssey." The film immediately starts off on the wrong foot with a needless flash-forward to an injured Kitai on Earth before it dives into a messy prologue that dumps a huge amount of information on the audience's lap. In a matter of minutes, we learn about humanity's flight from a polluted Earth, their eventual settlement on Nova Prime, the rise of the Ursa, and the discovery of 'ghosting' but the scenes feel poorly cobbled together, as if they were culled from the cutting room floor at the very last minute. Developed by Will Smith and written by Shyamalan (with an assist from Gary Whitta, whose previous credits include 2010's "The Book of Eli"), "After Earth" contains a kernel of a good idea. Unfortunately, the sci-fi world presented here raises more questions the more you think about it. Despite the fact that humanity has mastered interstellar travel, they're still fighting with metal sticks. Sure, the double-bladed 'cutlass' looks cool on-screen yet it's mind-boggling why the Rangers don't just use a gun to fight the Ursas. Also, if the creatures can track its prey through the 'scent' of fear, couldn't the Rangers wear special airtight suits or let advanced robotic drones do the heavy-lifting since they're 'technically blind?' It doesn't seem like Shyamalan thought the whole concept through. Sure, the 'Survival Manual' or the 300-page bible that the writers created probably might've clear up all these inconsistencies but I shouldn't have to read or buy a tie-in book in order to make sense of a film.

Once the ship crash-lands on Earth, the film devolves into tedium as it plods along, unable to muster any palpable sense of danger or excitement due to the slack pacing. The only notable set-piece is when Kitai skydives off a mountain cliff while being chased by a giant condor. At least Shyamalan continues to have a good eye for visuals with its vision of a wild Earth reclaimed by Mother Nature, which compensates for the dated CG effects and derivative creature designs. Plot-wise, "After Earth" runs into another roadblock as it turns a simple sci-fi coming-of-age tale into a self-important and overly preachy soap opera. Gabe Toro perfectly sums it up in his own review with the following line: 'it feels less like father and son, and more like a young boy listening to an inspirational audiobook.' The stories in many of Shyamalan's films have always been allegorical in nature but he takes this to an extreme degree here by being too literal with Kitai's personal journey. Just to hammer the point home, the director has the condor inexplicably rescue him even though the creature was trying to eat the boy before. It's obviously meant to symbolize a parent protecting its offspring but its inclusion goes against what the film established—that everything on Earth has evolved to kill humans. The concept of having a boy struggling to live up to his father's expectations while facing a sudden trial by fire is a sound idea. However, the execution is all wrong and it's hard to emotionally invest in these characters when the dialogue consists of banal platitudes like 'he doesn't need a commanding officer; he needs a father.'

"After Earth" is largely a two-person show as evidenced by the poster. While Jaden Smith managed to do a fine job in 2010's "The Karate Kid," his performance here leaves much to be desired. He just doesn't have the physicality to pull off a lead role in a big-budget film like this and comes across as a whiny brat whenever the scene calls for him to show emotion. Will Smith doesn't fare any better either as the script completely strips the actor of his trademark charisma and replaces it with a stodgy demeanor that's devoid of any personality whatsoever. Worse, he's confined to a single location for almost the entirety of the picture. Sophie Okonedo and Zoë Isabella Kravitz make the most of their limited roles but it's clear the film was run through with a chainsaw in the editing room as Isabelle Fuhrman, who was previously third billed, is reduced to a wordless, one-second cameo.

Released on May 31, 2013, "After Earth" has received overwhelmingly negative reviews with a paltry 11% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics labeled it as a 'dull, ploddingly paced exercise in sentimental sci-fi—and the latest setback for director M. Night Shyamalan's once-promising career.' Despite the star power of Will Smith, the film flopped at the domestic box office and grossed only $60.5 million. Foreign ticket sales, totaling $183.1 million, probably allowed Sony to recoup its losses but I highly doubt the studio will move forward with a sequel given its vitriolic reception from critics and moviegoers. "After Earth" may not be quite the disaster that "The Last Airbender" was but then again, that isn't saying much, is it?

Final Rating: 1.5 out of 5

"Now do not misunderstand me. Danger is very real, but fear is a choice."

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Getaway Review

Rated PG-13 (Intense Action, Violence and Mayhem Throughout, Some Rude Gestures, and Language)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 30 Minutes

Cast-

Ethan Hawke-Brent Magna

Selena Gomez-The Kid

Jon Voight-The Voice

Rebecca Budig-Leanne Magna

Paul Freeman (voice)-The Man

Bruce Payne-Distinguished Man

Ivailo Geraskov-Detective

Dimo Alexiev-Henchman #1

Slavi Pavlov-Henchman #2

Deyan Angelov-Henchman #3

Directed by Courtney Solomon

Ethan Hawke and Selena Gomez star in "Getaway," one of the worst films of 2013.

Note: Screened on Wednesday, August 28, 2013 at AMC Empire 25.

Ethan Hawke, what the hell happened with you?! You delivered such an amazing performance in Richard Linklater's "Before Midnight," without a doubt one of 2013's best, but then followed that up with two of the worst films of the year, first with June's "The Purge" and now with "Getaway." While "The Purge" at least tries to be more than your average home-invasion thriller with its intriguing premise, "Getaway" doesn't even bother with telling a proper story or offering up compelling characters. As Brian Orndorf so eloquently puts it in his own review, this is a film that's 'fueled entirely on stupidity,' and will leave you feeling bewildered and angry at how a moronic piece of trash like this got made in the first place. Poorly edited and packed full of headache-inducing, mind-numbingly repetitive car chases, "Getaway" is a dull, insipid mess that will drain away the entirety of your IQ over the course of its ninety-minute running time. Mr. Hawke, it's time to find yourself a new agent before its too late.

Brent Magna (Ethan Hawke), a former race car driver with a questionable past is looking for a fresh start in Sofia, Bulgaria but his world comes crashing down when he comes home on Christmas Eve to find his wife Leanne (Rebecca Budig) missing and the place in complete disarray. With the woman he loves held hostage by a dangerous criminal mastermind (Jon Voight), Brent is forced to step behind the wheel of a decked-out Shelby Mustang Super Snake in order to save her. Communicating through the car's advanced GPS, the man puts Brent under constant surveillance and tasks him with causing as much destruction as possible throughout the city in an effort to wear down the police. When a bratty street urchin (Selena Gomez) attempts to retrieve her stolen vehicle with a gun pointed at the ex-racer's head, the mysterious criminal instead decides to ensnare her into his scheme as well. Brent and the kid at first struggle to make sense of what's happening to them but the two soon realize that if they are to survive the night and rescue Leanne, they must work together to turn the tables on their captor.

I've lost count of how many bad films I've seen since I started writing reviews four-and-a-half years ago but Courtney Solomon's "Getaway" certainly hits a new low. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised considering the director's previous credits include the abysmal "Dungeons & Dragons" adaptation from 2000 and the little-seen horror film "An American Haunting." The first five minutes pretty much establishes what you're in for as our beleaguered protagonist 'Brent Magna' (a name that would feel right at home in a cheap porno) assaults a parking lot attendant and careens onto the streets of Bulgaria with a souped-up Shelby Mustang while the police are hot on his tail. There are car crashes galore but the editing is borderline incoherent, with each shot lasting only a split-second and chaotically strung together with little regard to spatial awareness or even basic geography. It's revealed that the criminal (lazily credited as 'The Voice') had small cameras mounted along the surface of the car, allowing Solomon to frequently cut to them in all their grainy glory yet his attempts to create a sense of 'intensity' simply add to the viewer's disorientation. A film like this could've definitely offered some B-movie thrills but the numerous car chases quickly wear out their welcome, with Brent's wanton destruction throughout the city blurring into a visually ugly, insufferable mess. Solomon switches things up during the latter half of the film by replacing police cars with thugs on motorcycles and I'll admit that the resulting orgy of explosions is impressive. In fact, I appreciated its use of old school stunt-work over CGI. An unbroken chase shown from a first-person perspective finally captures the visceral feeling that the film was going for but by then, it's already too little too late. "Getaway" spends so much time undermining the one thing it has going for, it's like Solomon wanted audiences to leave the theater aggravated.

Written by Sean Finegan and Gregg Maxwell Parker, the story is nothing more than a derivative mash-up of "Speed," "Phone Booth," and "Taken." However, that problem is small potatoes compared to the film's lack of logic, real world or otherwise. The Voice is quick to remind his captives that he can see and hear everything that happens in the car through the cameras mounted on the outside and yet Brent and 'the Kid' (Gomez's character isn't even provided with a name) continue to openly discuss how to thwart him, with the criminal on the other end not even bothering to lift a finger to stop them! The Bulgarian police are also completely inept at their jobs. Instead of sending wave after wave of police cars, why not just shoot out the tires or, I don't know, use spike strips? Even the Kid's technical know-how is presented in a laughable manner. Apparently, 'hacking' a camera or a server consists of tapping buttons and making a few swipes on an iPad. Steve Jobs must be rolling in his grave right now. What's worse is that Solomon has the gall to end the film on a cliffhanger and set up a sequel!

Ethan Hawke tries his best with his gravelly-voiced turn as Brent Magna but there's only so much he can do with the terrible material he's given. At one point, he shouts at his captor: 'I need to know when this sh*t is going to be over!' Ironically, we're all thinking the very same thing. Although the actor has appeared in his fair share of genre films (some of which are quite good like last year's "Sinister"), I wonder what possessed him to sign onto this one in the first place. Did he offend some high-powered studio executive or owe someone money? Selena Gomez's baby-faced looks might've worked to her advantage in Harmony Korine's "Spring Breakers" but she's woefully miscast here as a mini-Lisbeth Salander. Most of the time her character is shouting at Brent using every expletive except 'f*ck' or shrilly wailing during the film's endless car chases. And we're supposed to accept that this girl is a gifted computer hacker? On hand to pick up a paycheck is a wasted Jon Voight, who literally phones it in while sporting the most unconvincing Bulgarian accent ever…or what I assume to be Bulgarian.

Released on August 30, 2013, "Getaway" has usurped "Paranoia" as the worst-reviewed film of the year with a 2% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics called it 'monotonously fast-paced to the point of exhaustion' and labeled the film as 'a reminder of the dangers in attempting to speed past coherent editing, character development, sensible dialogue, and an interesting plot.' Considering its release date, it's obvious that Warner Brothers doesn't care about the film and is willing to settle for whatever scraps it makes over the Labor Day weekend. There's nothing more to be said about "Getaway" as this review is already doing it more justice than it truly deserves. Don't bother with this film unless you enjoy being ripped off.

Final Rating: 1 out of 5

"I need to know when this sh*t is going to be over!"

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Paranoia Review

Rated PG-13 (Some Sexuality, Violence and Language)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 46 Minutes

Cast-

Liam Hemsworth-Adam Cassidy

Amber Heard-Emma Jennings

Gary Oldman-Nicolas Wyatt

Harrison Ford-Jock Goddard

Richard Dreyfuss-Frank Cassidy

Embeth Davidtz-Dr. Judith Bolton

Julian McMahon-Miles Meechum

Lucas Till-Kevin

Angela Sarafyan-Allison

Josh Holloway-FBI Agent Gamble

Directed by Robert Luketic

You staring at my bald head? Get off my plane!

Note: Screened on Wednesday, August 14, 2013 at AMC Loews 34th Street 14.

You know summer is officially over when studios start releasing dreck like "Paranoia" into theaters. Given how privacy is fast becoming a thing of the past and the current hubbub surrounding the NSA's mass surveillance of American citizens (this is a surprise?), Robert Luketic's film, based on the 2004 novel of the same name from Joseph Finder, represented a great opportunity to explore the pitfalls of our modern digital culture but instead, it's content with recycling genre tropes that would've been already dated twenty years ago. Of course, this shouldn't come as a big surprise as Luketic has only directed one film that's actually worth watching (2001's "Legally Blonde") while the rest of his work is made up of insipid romantic comedies starring Katherine Heigl. Destined to fade from theaters quickly, "Paranoia" is another in a long line of generic techno-thrillers that neither thrills nor excites despite the presence of accomplished thespians like Gary Oldman and Harrison Ford, although women might find some enjoyment in seeing Liam Hemsworth's constantly shirtless frame.

Twenty-seven-year-old Brooklyn native Adam Cassidy (Liam Hemsworth) is an entry-level employee looking to climb the corporate ladder at Wyatt Industries. During a presentation with the company's founder Nicolas Wyatt (Gary Oldman), Adam and his entire team is fired on the spot when he makes a sarcastic comment about the CEO's lacking attention span. Despite being faced with mounting debt from his father's (Richard Dreyfuss) medical bills, Adam decides to treat his former co-workers to a night of drunken partying and blows $16,000 on the company credit card. The next day, a group of men led by Miles Meechum (Julian McMahon) stop Adam on his way home and brings him to Wyatt's office, where the CEO offers the recently-fired employee a deal: face jail time or take a job at rival corporation Eikon run by Jock Goddard (Harrison Ford), who just so happens to be Wyatt's former mentor. Blackmailed into becoming a corporate spy, Adam is tasked with stealing a smartphone design that is said to revolutionize the industry once it's released. In order to blend in, he is given a makeover by Wyatt's mysterious right-hand woman, Dr. Judith Bolton (Embeth Davidtz). Adam manages to charm the hiring manager and easily lands a job at Eikon but he quickly finds himself in way over his head when an FBI agent (Josh Holloway) starts snooping around, with his loyalties being put to the test due to his burgeoning romance with fellow employee Emma Jennings (Amber Heard).

A bland, lazy rehash of every mediocre techno-thriller from the nineties, Robert Luketic's "Paranoia" opens with our chiseled protagonist running around in nondescript alleyways while the names of the cast and crew appear with intentionally glitchy editing, just to clue you in that the film's about technology. The director must've thought he was being real clever with his stylistic choices here yet all it does is make you wonder if there's something wrong with the projector. That actually would've been preferable to sitting through this uninspired, clunky mess. In an attempt to add 'meaning' to the film, writers Jason Hall and Barry L. Levy position Adam as an entry-level worker who's become increasingly disillusioned with the concept of the American Dream. He voices his disgust via narration at the rise of greedy corporate executives who reap all the profits from the backs of decent, hard-working folks but at the same time, Adam worships this lifestyle and yearns to be part of their world. Not only does it make him out to be a hypocrite, it also prevents the audience from sympathizing with his plight. Adam complains about his inability to pay for his father's medical bills despite having a company card right in his hands and what's worse is that he ends up spending it all at some tacky nightclub with his friends. Even Wyatt, the 'greedy corporate executive,' points this out to him! If this was a comedy, Adam would be face-palming right now but that's giving the character too much credit.

The film tries hard to create a sense of tension and suspense, with Adam being chased around (in broad daylight no less) and having Wyatt's henchman Meechum watch his every move yet it all comes across as labored, with every twist and turn seemingly culled from the thriller handbook for dummies. Hall and Levy also display a complete lack of understanding of how modern technology works. The two throw in a bunch of technical jargon to give the appearance that their film is smart but its meaningless fluff meant only to fill the dead air left behind by the characters' banal dialogue exchanges. Apparently, a 2.72 GB file takes forever to transfer on a MacBook Pro (don't these things have USB 3.0 nowadays?) and Eikon, described as a corporation on the verge of a technological breakthrough, boasts a security system that's laughably easy to circumvent. Instead of actually scanning your thumbprint like it should, it scans a digital readout of that same print! When Adam hacks the cameras, one of the guards yell out this funny little gem: 'Get our IT guy on the line!' With dialogue like that, you have to wonder if anyone working on the film has ever used a computer before. The rest of "Paranoia" doesn't fare much better. Adam is magically transformed into a smooth-talking executive overnight and his romance with Emma is barely developed at all beyond a few scenes of them sleeping together. Coincidentally (or not), the two shared a one-night stand but Adam was too drunk to remember. The ending hinges on a ridiculous contrivance that relies on the central villains being completely unaware that tape recorders still exist. Given how overused this trick is, I'm surprised that people still fall for it again and again.

This is Liam Hemsworth's first role where he plays the lead but compared to his older brother Chris (whose star-power has risen since he was cast in 2011's "Thor"), he's little more than an 'empty vessel' as one character puts it and delivers a dull, listless performance that will put you to sleep, if the rest of the film hasn't already. Luketic seems to be aware of this so he has the actor spend as much time as possible without his shirt on. Amber Heard fares somewhat better, although she and Hemsworth share very little chemistry. Hell, watching two rocks make out with each other generates more heat when compared to these two. The only enjoyment that "Paranoia" will offer is seeing Gary Oldman and Harrison Ford reunite on-screen for the first time since 1997's "Air Force One," sixteen years ago. Oldman is in full scenery-chewing mode here with his thick Cockney accent while Ford (with his shiny bald dome) clearly looks bored but when the two share the screen together, you can literally see the sparks fly between them. They growl at each other with lines like 'You stood on my shoulders!' and 'Now I'm standing on your neck!' If only the rest of the film was this entertaining. Instead, we have mini-Thor running around for 106 minutes with absolutely no idea of what he's doing. The rest of the cast is rounded out by the always-reliable Richard Dreyfuss, Julian McMahon behaving like a total dick again, and Embeth Davidtz as Goddard's ice-cold right-hand woman. She even speaks with a posh British accent, just so it's clear that she's a villain. Josh Holloway's in there too in a blink-and-you'll-miss-him role as FBI agent Gamble.

Released on August 16, 2013, "Paranoia" has received the worst reviews of the year with a mere 4% on Rotten Tomatoes. There are only two positive reviews and one of them comes from 'quote whore' Pete Hammond. Funny story, I was the last one to get into the advance screening but by the end of the film, I was wondering if it was all worth it to begin with! Audiences are making the right choice by avoiding this mess of a thriller as it debuted in tenth place on opening day with a paltry $1.3 million, which means it'll disappear from theaters quickly. While "Paranoia" isn't so aggressively bad that it'll make you tear your hair out, the whole affair just feels tired, generic, and instantly forgettable. The only time you'll be gripping your seats is in anticipation of seeing this film end.

Final Rating: 2 out of 5

Nicholas Wyatt: You stood on my shoulders!

Jock Goddard: And now I'm standing on your neck!

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The Smurfs 2 3D Review

Rated PG (Some Rude Humor and Action)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 45 Minutes

Cast-

Neil Patrick Harris-Patrick Winslow

Jayma Mays-Grace Winslow

Brendan Gleeson-Victor Doyle

Hank Azaria-Gargamel

Jonathan Winters (voice)-Papa Smurf

Katy Perry (voice)-Smurfette

Anton Yelchin (voice)-Clumsy Smurf

George Lopez (voice)-Grouchy Smurf

John Oliver (voice)-Vanity Smurf

Christina Ricci (voice)-Vexy

J.B. Smoove (voice)-Hackus

Fred Armisen (voice)-Brainy Smurf

Alan Cumming (voice)-Gutsy Smurf

Jeff Foxworthy (voice)-Handy Smurf

Kenan Thompson (voice)-Greedy Smurf

Paul Reubens (voice)-Jokey Smurf

Shaquille O'Neal (voice)-Smooth Smurf

B.J. Novak (voice)-Baker Smurf

Jimmy Kimmel (voice)-Passive-Aggressive Smurf

Shaun White (voice)-Clueless Smurf

Mario Lopez (voice)-Social Smurf

Frank Welker (voice)-Azrael

Directed by Raja Gosnell

Smurfette is transported back to the real world where she meets the Naughties in "The Smurfs 2."

Note: Screened on Sunday, July 28, 2013 at AMC Magic Johnson Harlem 9.

Summer 2013 has already had its fair share of critical duds (the thought of "Grown Ups 2" still makes me shudder) but that list is about to get three apples bigger with "The Smurfs 2." Created by Belgian illustrator Peyo (real name Pierre Culliford) and first appearing in Spirou magazine in 1958, the Smurfs quickly proved to be a huge success but the little blue humanoids didn't emerge as the pop culture icons they are today until 1981 when animation studio Hanna-Barbera began producing a Saturday-morning cartoon based on the comic strip for NBC. The Emmy-award winning series (it won for Outstanding Children's Entertainment Series in 1982 and 1983) lasted for eight seasons with a whopping 256 episodes. The stories may have been paper-thin (even by 1980's standards) but for people who grew up during that era, it was like 'kiddie cocaine' as described by IGN. Given Hollywood's current obsession with everything 1980's, a feature film based on the Smurfs was inevitable. Released two years ago in 2011, Raja Gosnell's "The Smurfs" was only a moderate success in the U.S. but once the film's international grosses were factored in, the total box office take stood at $563.7 million despite its overwhelmingly negative reviews (22% on Rotten Tomatoes). I recently sat down to watch "The Smurfs" in preparation for the sequel and while it's not as bad as I thought it would be, the film is still rather mediocre (not to mention terribly dull) with its cringe-inducing 'jokes' and distracting product placement. To be released on July 31, "The Smurfs 2" is slightly more tolerable compared to its predecessor and children will undoubtedly love it but the whole affair remains a clumsy (no pun intended), half-hearted mess that's packed to the brim with annoyingly derivative cartoon violence.

Finding herself plagued by nightmares that she'll betray her fellow Smurfs, Smurfette (Katy Perry) shares her concerns with Papa Smurf (Jonathan Winters), who reassures his adopted daughter that Smurf Village is where she truly belongs. Meanwhile, the other Smurfs are busy planning a birthday party for Smurfette and are intent on keeping it a surprise but this leads to Smurfette thinking that everyone had forgotten. The evil wizard Gargamel (Hank Azaria), still trapped in the real world, has reinvented himself as a beloved stage magician with his Smurf essence-powered illusions and has even managed to create a pair of Smurf-like clones called the 'Naughties.' However, he lacks Papa Smurf's secret formula to turn them into real Smurfs. Using the Eiffel Tower as a conduit, Gargamel opens a portal to Smurf Village and sends one of his Naughties, Vexy (Christina Ricci), to kidnap Smurfette so that he can force her to divulge the secret formula. Quickly putting together a rescue team consisting of Clumsy (Anton Yelchin), Grouchy (George Lopez), and Vanity Smurf (John Oliver), Papa Smurf travels to New York City using his magic crystals in order to ask for Patrick Winslow's (Neil Patrick Harris) help in locating Smurfette. Traveling to Paris with his wife Grace (Jayma Mays) and stepfather Victor (Brendan Gleeson), Patrick and the Smurfs set out to rescue Smurfette before Gargamel learns of the secret formula.

Owing its existence to the original's sizable box office haul, "The Smurfs 2" is an unwarranted follow-up that is content with recycling the same story, the same jokes, and the same themes to mind-numbing effect. With five people working on the script, you'd think they come up with something a little more inspired. At least the egregious product placement is somewhat lessened, although we still get scenes where Gargamel spends ten whole minutes waving a Sony tablet in front of our faces. This time around, Smurfette is put front-and-center as her fear of reverting to her 'naughty' self returns on her birthday due to Gargamel being her 'real' father. When Vexy suddenly whisks Smurfette away to the real world, a small group of Smurfs led by Papa follow behind to rescue her as the action switches from New York City to more tax-friendly Paris. That's as 'innovative' as this sequel gets, with the rest of the film resorting to the usual noisy hijinks that are tailor-made to the ADD crowd. The slapstick comedy is uninspired, specifically Clumsy's antics. He's constantly tripping over himself, which is not only exasperating to watch but leads me to wonder why the other Smurfs don't just put him down considering the guy is such a hazard to himself and others. When you're watching a film this boring, your mind tends to wander. Although there are a few amusing bits to be found, such as Vanity Smurf's tendency to over-admire himself in the mirror or when Patrick's stepdad is turned into a duck (I'm not even kidding here), "The Smurfs 2" will most likely leave those over the age of seven stone-faced.

The script also comes off as half-baked, which shouldn't come as a surprise. Gargamel flat out admits to Vexy and the moronic Hackus (J.B. Smoove) that he's basically going to kill them for their essence once he turns them into real Smurfs and yet they happily help him with his plan anyway. What are they, Suicidal Smurfs? One of the more bearable aspects of the previous film was Patrick's struggle with his impending responsibilities as a father. This theme of fatherhood is revisited once again (albeit with some minor variations) as Patrick has to learn to accept his stepdad while Smurfette deals with her own daddy issues. Both of them come to realize that a parent doesn't necessarily have to be biological to love and care for you. I admit this is a nice sentiment but it's hard to imagine how this could be of any interest to kids. Still, it's one of the few elements in the film that doesn't want to make you claw your own eyes out, even if it is painfully clichéd.

As far as the animation goes, it's slick-looking (with the exception of the poorly-rendered Azrael) and the Smurfs themselves are pretty detailed whenever the camera zooms in close on them. One particular visual highlight is when Smurfette, Vexy, and Hackus fly around Paris on storks. However, the integration between live-action and CG never feels entirely seamless because the Smurfs are missing a sort of tangibility compared to something like Ted, from the 2012 film of the same name. The 3D fares the worse. Save for a few moments where particle effects are involved, it's completely non-existent. Scenes were literally in 2D when I took off my glasses to see how much 3D was being utilized. Hell, the 'Sony Digital Cinema 4K' logo looked more three-dimensional compared to the entire film itself! If you must go see "The Smurfs 2," avoid the 3D version because you're essentially getting ripped-off.

The performances are a mixed bag, with the voice cast faring better as opposed to the live-action one. As likable as Neil Patrick Harris is, he's shackled by the film's overly-cartoonish tone and at times, he looks positively embarrassed to be starring in it. The amazingly adorable Jayma Mays seems to be enjoying herself while Brendan Gleeson throws himself into his role as stepdad Victor with wild abandon. He treats the film as a lark and genuinely appears to be having fun, especially when his character is transformed into a duck. I can't say the same for Hank Azaria though. His go-for-broke performance as the inept wizard Gargamel was incredibly grating on my nerves and is even worse than hearing fingernails on a chalkboard. The voice cast, which includes Anton Yelchin, George Lopez, and John Oliver among others, put in some good work but the standouts are definitely Jonathan Winters and yes, Katy Perry. Winters, who sadly passed away in April, exhibits a wise, grandfatherly warmth as Papa Smurf while Perry's Smurfette is endearingly sweet and dare I say, cute.

Set for release on July 31, 2013, reviews for "The Smurfs 2" are slowly trickling out but I doubt it'll improve much compared to the original, if at all, with the score on Rotten Tomatoes currently sitting at 40%. Ultimately though, it doesn't really matter what critics say because parents will take their children to see the film regardless of how negative the reviews are. Its box office success is pretty much assured and a third installment has already been green-lit by Sony Pictures Animation for 2015. Although certain aspects of this sequel weren't wholly terrible, it doesn't change the fact "The Smurfs 2" is an uninspired, formulaic, and cynically-made product designed to appeal to the lowest-common-denominator. Hey, at least it's not as bad as "Grown Ups 2." That's the best damn praise I can give.

Final Rating: 2 out of 5

"As someone wonderful once told me, it doesn't matter where you came from. What matters is who you choose to be."

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R.I.P.D. 3D Review

Rated PG-13 (Violence, Sci-Fi/Fantasy Action, Some Sensuality, and Language including Sex References)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 36 Minutes

Cast-

Jeff Bridges-Roy Pulsipher

Ryan Reynolds-Nick Walker

Kevin Bacon-Bobby Hayes

Mary-Louise Parker-Mildred Proctor

Stephanie Szostak-Julia Walker

Robert Knepper-Stanley Nawlicki

James Hong-Jerry Chen/Nick's Avatar

Marisa Miller-Opal Pavlenko/Roy's Avatar

Mike O'Malley-Elliot

Devin Ratray-Pulaski

Directed by Robert Schwentke

"R.I.P.D."--another in a long line of ill-fated comic book films.

Note: Screened on Thursday, July 18, 2013 at Regal E-Walk Stadium 13.

Comic book films rake in billions of dollars worldwide year after year but that doesn't mean Hollywood should go and adapt every comic book property for the big-screen. Looking back, was 2005's "Elektra" really necessary? Who in their right minds was expecting that film to gross $100 million, especially in January?! Such is the case for "R.I.P.D.," based on the 1999 mini-series created by Peter Lenkov and published by Dark Horse Comics, whose film division hasn't enjoyed the best track record compared to their more famous competitors. 2004's "Hellboy" and its 2008 sequel stands as one of their biggest successes but then you have 1999's "Virus" and 2005's horrid "Son of the Mask," widely considered to be one of the worst films ever made. Dumped into theaters with little to no fanfare, "R.I.P.D." occasionally stirs to life thanks to Jeff Bridges' lively performance but Robert Schwentke's film is pretty much dead on arrival with its bland script, flat comedy, and subpar action scenes.

Wanting to secure a better financial future with his wife Julia (Stephanie Szostak), Boston police officer Nick Walker (Ryan Reynolds) and his longtime partner Bobby Hayes (Kevin Bacon) pilfer a cache of gold during a drug bust but Nick's guilt gets the better of him and he makes it clear to Bobby that he no longer wants to steal anymore. The two are soon called in to take part in a massive raid against a meth operation but Bobby double-crosses Nick and guns him down in cold-blood while the other officers are engaged in a shootout with the drug dealers. Nick dies and is whisked away upward to the afterlife, where he is given a choice by Mildred Proctor (Mary-Louise Parker): join the R.I.P.D. (the Rest in Peace Department) for one-hundred years or risk judgment from the 'Big Guy' upstairs. Seeing this as a chance to reunite with his wife, Nick readily chooses the former and is paired with veteran R.I.P.D. officer Roy Pulsipher (Jeff Bridges), a former lawman from the 1800's. Roy begins to show Nick the ropes and fills him in on taking out 'Deados,' troubled souls who have remained trapped on Earth instead of moving on to Heaven or Hell. As Nick slowly gets used to his new existence, he and Roy uncover a plot involving Hayes that could spell doom for the entire world if his plans succeed.

"R.I.P.D." is one of those films that will leave you wondering how it even got made in the first place. Director Robert Schwentke tries to recapture the humorous, irreverent tone of 1997's "Men in Black" but he stumbles out of the gate from the very first scene as audiences are greeted by a poorly-rendered CG ghoul jumping around while our two lead characters give chase. Cribbing from Barry Sonnenfeld's film as well as 1984's "Ghostbusters," the central premise revolves around dead law enforcement officers who find themselves recruited in the afterlife by a police force calling itself the R.I.P.D. Each new recruit is given a minimum term of service of one-hundred years and are tasked with either capturing or killing renegade souls that have evaded judgment. As derivative as that sounds, I'll admit to being intrigued but the end result is a lumbering bore that wheezes from scene to scene despite its brief 96 minute running time. There are some amusing flourishes, such as the R.I.P.D. headquarters being populated with officers from different eras and that their method of travel to the real world is through a portable toilet, which exits out to a rundown VCR repair store. The 'Deados' they capture are revealed through a series of bizarre questions or by exposing them to cumin (I'm not even kidding here). However, people from the real world perceive the officers differently, with Nick looking like an elderly Asian man (played by the great James Hong) while Roy resembles a Victoria's Secret model (Marisa Miller). This unusual setup is funny the first time but it quickly wears out its welcome and most of the jokes are just too stale to garner any laughs.

The script from Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi (whose previous credits include 2005's "Æon Flux" and 2010's "Clash of the Titans") is content with recycling the same old buddy cop clichés where Roy treats his new partner with disdain due to his lack of experience, forcing Nick to prove himself to the veteran. Now, these are issues that can be overcome if the two leads have a good rapport with each other but that's unfortunately not the case. Ryan Reynolds plays one of the blandest protagonists I've ever witnessed and looks completely bored throughout the film. Jeff Bridges manages to add some life to the proceedings with his hammy performance as Roy Pulsipher. The Academy Award winner is pretty much parodying his own role as Rooster Cogburn from 2010's "True Grit" and genuinely seems to be having fun; it's just too bad that he's saddled with the dead weight that is Reynolds. The rest of the cast is also a mixed bag. Kevin Bacon speaks with this awful Boston accent while Stephanie Szostak is reduced to being the damsel-in-distress. Mary-Louise Parker lands a few solid laughs as Mildred Proctor, the R.I.P.D.'s no-nonsense personal manager. It makes you wish that the film focused on her and Bridges' characters instead.

Although its production budget is listed as $130 million, it doesn't seem like Schwentke put it to good use. The ghoulish 'Deados' that the R.I.P.D. battles with is frequently marred by poor CG work and the finale makes the film look like something out of the SyFy channel. Hell, I was almost expecting a shark to come leaping out of those whirling portals! The 3D conversion is also rather shoddy and was apparently done in only five months. There are moments where there's a noticeable sense of depth, particularly with scenes involving lots of dust or debris but the image is literally flat for most of its running time. You could actually just take off your glasses and watch the film without them since the amount of blur is very minimal, almost to the point of being non-existent.

Released on July 19, 2013, "R.I.P.D." has received overwhelmingly negative reviews with 15% on Rotten Tomatoes. Universal was hiding the film until the very last minute and it was screened for critics mere hours before its official release. Their consensus: 'it has its moments—most of them courtesy of Jeff Bridges' rootin' tootin' performance as an undead Wild West sheriff—but [the film] is ultimately too dim-witted and formulaic to satisfy.' Due to a weak marketing campaign, it's pretty much guaranteed to be a box office flop this weekend, with Universal standing to lose a bundle of money on this one. Made without any passion or energy, "R.I.P.D." is a waste of time for everyone and it's a real shame that the studio chose to waste $130 million on this crap rather than invest in something better.

Final Rating: 2 out of 5

"We are the greatest law men that ever lived and died. Now, some souls hide out among the living. Here's the deal. Our job is catching bad souls that escaped the afterlife. Bag it, tag it and bury it deep."

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Grown Ups 2 Review

Rated PG-13 (Crude and Suggestive Content, Language and Some Male Rear Nudity)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 41 Minutes

Cast-

Adam Sandler-Lenny Feder

Kevin James-Eric Lamonsoff

Chris Rock-Kurt McKenzie

David Spade-Marcus Higgins

Nick Swardson-Nicholas Hilliard

Salma Hayek-Roxanne Chase-Feder

Maria Bello-Sally Lamonsoff

Maya Rudolph-Deanne McKenzie

Steve Buscemi-Wiley

Colin Quinn-Dickie Bailey

Tim Meadows-Malcolm

Shaquille O'Neal-Officer Fluzoo

Peter Dante-Officer Dante

Steve Austin-Tommy Cavanaugh

Georgia Engel-Mrs. Lamonsoff

Taylor Lautner-Andy

Milo Ventimiglia-Milo

Patrick Schwarzenegger-Cooper

Alexander Ludwig-Braden

Jake Goldberg-Greg Feder

Cameron Boyce-Keithie Feder

Alexys Nycole Sanchez-Becky Feder

Ada-Nicole Sanger-Donna Lamonsoff

Frank and Morgan Gingerich-Bean Lamonsoff

Nadji Jeter-Andre McKenzie

China Anne McClain-Charlotte McKenzie

Kaleo Elam-Ronnie McKenzie

Directed by Dennis Dugan

These guys need a new beach house...so they made "Grown Ups 2."

Note: Screened on Wednesday, July 10, 2013 at AMC Loews 34th Street 14.

I don't get paid to be a film critic and the reason I do what I do is because I genuinely love watching movies but sometimes…it feels like work. Watching "Grown Ups 2" is one of those times. Released back in 2010, the original "Grown Ups" was trashed by critics (10% on Rotten Tomatoes) but audiences around the world ate it up to the tune of $271.4 million, making it one of Adam Sandler's biggest hits in his career. I've only recently watched the film and I have to say, it is one of the worst 'comedies' I've ever suffered through. There are only three good laughs and that's already stretching it. Sandler has been in a downward spiral for the past three years, with "Just Go With It," "Jack and Jill," and last year's abominable "That's My Boy" averaging only 14% on Rotten Tomatoes. That's frankly pathetic. The SNL-veteran was never a comedic savant but his man-child antics used to be funny because they felt inspired; now it's just lazy, tired, and insulting. It's like he's completely given up. In fact, "That's My Boy" left me so angry that I wanted to punch someone in the face! "Grown Ups 2" doesn't provoke the extreme revulsion I had for Sandler's previous film but the whole affair still comes off as a boring, juvenile waste of time that exists only to take the audience's hard-earned money to fund the cast's next beach house while flicking the middle finger at them for paying to see such garbage.

Big-shot Hollywood agent Lenny Feder (Adam Sandler) moves his wife Roxanne (Salma Hayek) and their three children back to his Massachusetts hometown as a way to stay close to his childhood best friends: Eric Lamonsoff (Kevin James), Kurt McKenzie (Chris Rock), and eternal bachelor Marcus Higgins (David Spade). On the last day of school, the quartet decides to play hooky with drug-addled bus driver Nicholas Hilliard (Nick Swardson) while planning for an 80's-themed outdoor party to kick off the summer in style. In an effort to recapture the glory days of their youth, Lenny and his buddies revisit an old swimming hole so Eric can face his fears of diving off the cliff but they run afoul of a group of testosterone-ridden frat boys led by Andy (Taylor Lautner). Crazy hijinks ensue as the four come to terms with hitting middle-age.

It's really amazing how director Dennis Dugan and the writers (which include Sandler, Tim Herlihy, and Fred Wolf) took the loose story structure of the original "Grown Ups" and made it even more plot-less. I actually struggled to summarize the sequel because there is no narrative to speak of; it's essentially just a series of vignettes where the characters literally spend their time smelling each other's farts and giggling about it like a bunch of mentally-challenged twelve-year-olds. Opening with a terribly rendered CG deer urinating into Lenny's mouth (a gag that the filmmakers found so hilarious that they repeat it thirty seconds later on his son), "Grown Ups 2" pretty much goes downhill from there with its stale and relentlessly puerile assortment of 'jokes' involving various bodily fluids and mocking others for either being old, ugly, foreign, or gay. Of course, almost none of is funny since there's absolutely no context to it. Apparently, we're supposed to laugh along at the mere sight of a pee stain…and don't even get me started on the 'burp snart.' Sure, there are some intermittent chuckles but you can count them on one hand. The biggest laugh in "Grown Ups 2" is when Hayek's Roxanne cracks a joke about Shaq's lousy free-throw record in front of the retired basketball player himself (who plays a police officer). One good laugh out of a 101-minute film; that has to be some sort of world record.

The thinly-developed subplots weave in and out of the film without much rhyme or reason. Roxanne wants to have another baby but Lenny is already content with the three kids they have. Eric is secretly spending all his free time at his mother's (Georgia Engel) to get the attention his wife Sally (Maria Bello) isn't giving him while Kurt is enjoying the fact that his wife Deanne (Maya Rudolph) forgot about their twentieth anniversary. Finally, Marcus finds out he has a teenage son named Braden (Alexander Ludwig) but doesn't quite know how to connect with him. The children are also dealing with their own individual issues yet none of it matters. There's no drama, no tension, so ultimately we just don't care what happens to these people. Worse, the film's anti-bullying message is completely at odds with many of the characters' actions. The women repeatedly make snide comments to another female for looking too masculine in their yoga class and the ending has everyone throw down with a bunch of frat boys because all problems can be solved by punching your way out of them. Seriously, if you look up the causes for brain damage, "Grown Ups 2" would be on the list.

Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, and David Spade are all capable of being funny when they at least try but in this film, they take their comedic talent and flush it down the toilet. Inexplicably missing from the group is Rob Schneider. Given all the dreck he's appeared in over the years, his absence is probably the wisest move he's made in his entire career. He's replaced by Nick Swardson, who serves as the film's punching bag. The women, which includes Salma Hayek, Mario Bello, and Maya Rudolph, all play complete morons. At one point, their characters become victims of sexual harassment but they just brush it off like it's no big deal even though I'm pretty sure a crime was just committed. I feel sorry for Hayek; she's a critically-acclaimed actress and one of the most beautiful women in the world who's reduced to being leered at and farted on. The various celebrity cameos such as Shaquille O'Neal and 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin provide a modicum of fun but like all novelties, it quickly fades away. Taylor Lautner seems to be the only actor who's in on the joke, which is ironic because his whole career is a joke.

To be released on July 12, 2013, "Grown Ups 2" has received overwhelmingly negative reviews with a mere 5% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics concluded that the film will 'bore, annoy, and disgust audiences,' with the exception of those who love seeing deer piss on people. Hell, the deer could even be symbolizing Sandler pissing on your intelligence while taking your money. What really angers me is that audiences are actually looking forward to seeing this over Guillermo del Toro's "Pacific Rim." Many box office analysts are projecting Sandler's film to gross around $40 million over the weekend but I wouldn't discount del Toro yet as his film is currently outselling last month's "World War Z" at the same point according to Fandango. If you haven't figured it out already, don't see "Grown Ups 2." By willingly giving your money away, you are asking to be slapped. This film doesn't just scrape the bottom of the barrel; it sh*ts all over it.

Final Rating: 1 out of 5

"I haven't been around this many arrogant white college kids since Eminem played Duke."

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The Purge Review

Rated R (Strong Disturbing Violence and Some Language)

Running Time: 1 Hour & 25 Minutes

Cast-

Ethan Hawke-James Sandin

Lena Headey-Mary Sandin

Adelaide Kane-Zoey Sandin

Max Burkholder-Charlie Sandin

Edwin Hodge-Bloody Stranger

Rhys Wakefield-Polite Stranger

Tony Oller-Henry

Arija Bareikis-Grace Ferrin

Dana Bunch-Mr. Ferrin

Tisha French-Mrs. Halverson

Chris Mulkey-Mr. Halverson

Tom Yi-Mr. Cali

Peter Gvozdas-Dr. Peter Buynak

Directed by James DeMonaco

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, and hide yo husband, cuz they be purgin’ everyone out here!

Note: Screened on Monday, June 3, 2013 at the Angelika Film Center.

Famous comedian Bill Cosby once said that 'the main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.' The Boston Bombing, the Sandy Hook massacre, the Aurora shooting…we are constantly surrounded by violence and it's gotten to the point where such events aren't even shocking anymore; we've become desensitized to them. Whether its resources, religion, ideology, or plain simple hatred, humans have been killing each other since the dawn of time and it all leads back to one age-old question: are we an inherently violent species? That's a very big issue to tackle, especially for a horror/thriller flick like James DeMonaco's "The Purge," the latest from low-budget producer Blumhouse Productions. Summer isn't usually the best time to release a horror film (Remember last year's "Chernobyl Diaries"? Of course you don't) but that hasn't stopped Hollywood studios from chasing after the next sleeper hit. This is DeMonaco's second time sitting in the director's chair (his previous credits include 2009's "Staten Island" and the script for the "Assault on Precinct 13" remake) and he's once again recruited Ethan Hawke to his cause by casting him in the lead role. Although "The Purge" offers up an intriguing social allegory between the haves and the have-nots, the film unfortunately devolves into a generic home-invasion thriller, thereby squandering what few good ideas it has.

In the year 2022, the United States is 'a nation reborn' and experiencing a wave of prosperity thanks to the efforts of the 'New Founding Fathers,' who've not only virtually eliminated crime and poverty, but also reduced unemployment to a mere 1%. Their success is attributed to the 28th Amendment, which institutes an annual 'Purge' over the course of one single night—March 21-22, from 7:00 P.M. to 7:00 A.M.—where all criminal activity, including murder, is legal. Police, fire, and emergency medical services are suspended during this twelve-hour period, with the only restrictions being that 'Level 10' government officials are off-limits and usage of 'Class 4' weaponry is forbidden. Taking advantage of the Purge is high-tech home security salesman James Sandin (Ethan Hawke), who's been making a killing in the business and is even planning on buying a boat! As the night in question gets underway, James locks down his home and settles in for a quiet evening with his wife Mary (Lena Headey), and teenage children Charlie (Max Burkholder) and Zoey (Adelaide Kane). When Charlie overhears a homeless, bloodied stranger (Edwin Hodge) begging for help, he panics and lets him in, throwing the Sandin's home into disarray. A stand-off ensues between James and the stranger but it is interrupted by Zoey's boyfriend Henry (Tony Oller), who attempts to gun her father down for trying to end their relationship. The Sandins are soon besieged by a group of masked Purgers led by a Polite Stranger (Rhys Wakefield), who gives the family an ultimatum: deliver the homeless 'swine' or he will kill them all.

"The Purge" definitely starts off on a strong and promising note as video-camera footage of previous Purges are shown during the opening credits while Claude Debussy's Clair de Lune plays in the background. It immediately sets a chilling and disturbing tone, with the grainy feeds depicting various acts of brutal violence. The rationale behind the Purge is that humans are inherently violent and that the only way to keep those urges in check is to let them loose for one day a year. It's not exactly the most original of concepts (the "Star Trek" episode 'The Return of the Archons' featured a very similar premise) but it does inspire debate and that's not something you see every day in a genre film. Various talking heads argue over the ethics of the Purge, with some accusing it of being a ploy to weed out undesirables. DeMonaco raises a number of interesting questions in regards to human nature and class warfare, and I found his dystopian vision of America compelling but it doesn't seem like he thought it through logically. The film is set nine years from now. How can our country be upended so suddenly to allow such an event to take place? Even more problematic are the rules and regulations, which contradict each other. It's stated that there is no police during the Purge so who makes sure that no one uses a restricted weapon during this supposed 'free-for-all'? By far the most puzzling aspect is why people don't just pack their bags and leave the country. There has to be those who don't support the Purge and honestly, can mankind's violent urges be contained to one single night? What's stopping them from committing crimes on any other day of the year? The more you think about the premise, the more holes that pop up!

Not only does DeMonaco fail to develop his ideas but he completely abandons them in the second half of the film as it devolves into a rip-off of "The Strangers." This being a Blumhouse Production, the Sandin's home is predictably plunged into darkness when the masked Purgers cut the power, leaving you to wonder why James would install a security system that can be broken into without any effort at all. What follows is a generic game of hide-and-seek, with suspense replaced by characters behaving in the most idiotic manner possible. Instead of sticking with the rest of her family, a hysterical Zoey runs off on her own for no discernible reason but she looks like a genius compared to her little brother Charlie. It is his actions that put his entire family in danger in the first place! There is one memorable scene, however, and it takes place in a rec room where James is surrounded by multiple intruders, forcing him to basically go Rambo. Although excellently choreographed, it has the unfortunate side effect of undermining the film's overall message. "The Purge" serves as a cautionary tale against violence yet we're expected to cheer when James is blasting away the loonies like he's in "Call of Duty." Sure, he's defending his family and home but killing is killing no matter the reasons. By fetishizing the very violence that he's critiquing, DeMonaco has created a film that's both morally confused and amoral.

Acting-wise, it's a mixed bag. Ethan Hawke is obviously only on-hand to pick up a paycheck yet he still manages to lend some weight to his character as he grapples with his moral compass. Lena Headey is fine but her interactions with Hawke feel stilted; it's hard to see the two as a married couple. Playing their children are Max Burkholder and Adelaide Kane, and while I have nothing against them, it doesn't change the fact that they're little more than poorly-developed horror clichés who run around making the worst decisions possible. The cast's sole saving grace is Rhys Wakefield as the Polite Stranger. Posh, creepy, menacing, and thoroughly sadistic with his Joker-like grin, the Australian actor certainly makes for an appropriately unhinged antagonist. Warner Brothers would be wise to look to his performance here when it comes time to fill the role for the Clown Prince of Crime in their eventual "Batman" reboot (You know it's happening!).

"The Purge" was released on June 7, 2013 to largely mixed reviews, with 41% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics admired DeMonaco's 'attempts to use thriller formula to make an intelligent point—but [the film] ultimately end up sinking in numbing violence and tired clichés.' Universal is obviously hoping for this to become the next "Paranormal Activity" and it appears their investment is paying off in a big way. Made on a measly production budget of $3 million, the film has already grossed five times this amount and is expected to finish the weekend with $35 million! I am honestly at a loss for words because it didn't seem like there was much interest or awareness among moviegoers, although the advance screening on Monday did pack a full house. It just goes to show how easy an effective marketing campaign can turn crap into gold. Its premise is ripe with potential but DeMonaco's "The Purge" fails to do anything meaningful with it, resorting to tired horror tropes and frankly, wasting our time.

Final Rating: 2 out of 5

"Our target for this year's Purge is hiding in your home. You have one hour to find him and give him to us or we will kill all of you."

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