Rated
PG-13 (Crude and Sexual Content, Thematic Elements and Language)
Running
Time: 1 Hour & 50 Minutes
Cast-
Elizabeth
Banks-Wendy
Cameron
Diaz-Jules
Jennifer
Lopez-Holly
Anna
Kendrick-Rosie
Brooklyn
Decker-Skyler
Ben
Falcone-Gary
Matthew
Morrison-Evan
Rodrigo
Santoro-Alex
Dennis
Quaid-Ramsey
Chace
Crawford-Marco
Chris
Rock-Vic
Rob
Huebel-Gabe
Thomas
Lennon-Craig
Amir
Talai-Patel
Joe
Manganiello-Davis
Wendi
McLendon-Covey-Kara
Rebel
Wilson-Janice
Megan
Mullally-As Herself
Directed
by Kirk Jones
 |
| Chris Rock and Thomas Lennon as emasculated men in Lionsgate's "What to Expect When You're Expecting." |
Sometimes
you really have to wonder if Hollywood is run by a bunch of monkeys wearing
expensive suits. Not content with just board games, studio executives have now
taken to adapting pregnancy guides
into films as well. Next year it’ll be car manuals or even better, a raunchy
comedy about plumbing! First published in 1984 and now in its fourth edition, Heidi
Murkoff and Sharon Hazel’s What to Expect
When You're Expecting has been dubbed ‘the bible of American pregnancy’
with a reported 93% of all expectant mothers having read the book. However, the
guide has received criticism for promoting fear and paranoia among pregnant
women by emphasizing worst-case scenarios and the fact that Murkoff has no
formal medical training. What Murkoff has is a lot of money because she has created an entire series of What to Expect advice books for women.
Latching onto its popularity like leeches, some studio executive had the bright
idea of turning Murkoff’s book into a full-fledged film despite the fact that
it is a pregnancy guide! Lionsgate’s
“What to Expect When You're Expecting” has a likable ensemble cast and a few
humorous moments but the whole affair feels like an episodic sitcom full of
manufactured drama that fails to resonate and is superficially resolved.
The
film follows five couples living in Atlanta, Georgia as they face the trials
and tribulations of pregnancy and childbirth. Reality stars Jules (Cameron Diaz)
and Evan (Matthew Morrison) discover to their surprise that they are going to
be parents after winning the top prize in a celebrity dance-off show. Jules
becomes obsessed with learning everything she can about the pregnancy process
but argues with Evan on whether they should get their baby circumcised. Rosie
(Anna Kendrick) is a young woman who reunites with an old flame from high
school named Marco (Chace Crawford) after engaging in a turf war with their
respective food trucks. Unfortunately, Rosie becomes pregnant after her
one-night stand with him. Holly (Jennifer Lopez) is a struggling photographer
who has been trying to conceive a baby for years with her husband Alex (Rodrigo
Santoro). They decide to adopt an orphan from Ethiopia but Alex feels that he
isn’t ready to embrace fatherhood. He seeks advice from an eccentric group of dads
comprised of Vic (Chris Rock), Gabe (Rob Huebel), Craig (Thomas Lennon), and
Patel (Amir Talai) who ‘blow off steam’ in the local park. Finally, Wendy
(Elizabeth Banks), author and owner of a boutique named The Breast Choice, has managed to conceive a baby with her husband
Gary (Ben Falcone) after trying for two years. Gary has an estranged
relationship with his father, Ramsey (Dennis Quaid), a former race car champion
for NASCAR now married to a much younger woman named Skyler (Brooklyn Decker).
When Ramsey reveals that Skyler is pregnant with twins, Gary ends up engaging
in another petty competition with his father.
Eric Hynes of The Village Voice perfectly sums up “What
to Expect When You're Expecting”: ‘[the film] strictly follows Hollywood's
culturally appeasing comedy template: sophomoric mockery of all that's held
sacred followed (and neatly corrected) by an affirmation of traditional values.’
Like Gary Marshall’s “Valentine’s Day” from 2010, director Kirk Jones’ latest
effort is nothing but groan-inducing cliché after cliché with underdeveloped
characters who are little more than simplistic stereotypes. None of the
individual subplots prove to be all that interesting and are loosely interconnected with each other,
usually by coincidence. The script from Shauna Cross and Heather Hach touches
upon a number of complex issues with raising children but its episodic
structure and sitcom-like situations set up to garner a few cheap laughs
ultimately undermine the film. Anna Kendrick’s Rosie suffers a traumatic event
early in her pregnancy in what is the film’s sole emotional scene that recalls
Pixar’s “Up” from 2009 but the consequences of it are quickly pushed aside and
are superficially dealt with. The financial burden and fear of not being ready
to raise a child is also touched upon with Jennifer Lopez and Rodrigo Santoro’s
characters but the script goes nowhere with it and resolves all of the problems
that each couple go through with a neat little bow manufactured to leave the audience
with a smile on their faces. Lopez even whines at one point that she’s the one
who ‘can't do the one thing that a woman is supposed to be able to do,’ a line
that borders on being misogynistic.
The main problem with “What to Expect When
You're Expecting” is that it fails to make you emotionally invest in what the
characters are going through because the issues they deal with feel trivial and
have little basis in reality. Much of what it espouses also feels
contradictory. Elizabeth Banks’ Wendy has a hormone-driven meltdown (which
always happens to take place in public) where she comes to realize that
pregnancy isn’t the ‘miracle’ that it’s made out to be but does a complete 180
when she reaffirms the ‘beauty’ of childbirth while holding her newborn in her
arms later in the film. The ending has four
of the couples simultaneously arriving in the same hospital to give birth to their children! Talk about
synchronized contractions! While it has its fair share of comedy, none of the
material is particularly funny outside of a handful of individual moments. The
‘dudes group’ led by Chris Rock elicits a few chuckles as they speak of their
emasculation with strange pride but their inclusion is ultimately pointless
other than to add more marquee names to the poster. The film lightly touches
upon the hardships of pregnancy from Murkoff’s book but offers little insight
that is of actual value. Hynes ends his review by remarking that ‘much like the
culture at large, [it] insists that pleasure ends when parenting begins, yet
also that the parenting life is the only one worth living. God forbid there
could be something in between.’ “What to Expect When You're Expecting” is a
prime example of the creative bankruptcy that continues to plague Hollywood but
what’s even sadder is the fact the audiences enjoy this shallow crap.
Some of the
ensemble cast acquit themselves in their roles despite their characters being
written as broad stereotypes. However, Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Lopez come
across as whiny, unsympathetic bitches while Matthew Morrison (from Fox’s
musical comedy/drama “Glee”) seems to have stepped out of a cheesy soap opera. Maybe
he should just stick to television. Elizabeth Banks gives a lively performance
and her interactions with her assistant Janice, played by Rebel Wilson,
provides much of the film’s laughs (what little there is). Anna Kendrick and Chace
Crawford have believable chemistry but their characters aren’t given much to
do, as does Chris Rock, whose screen-time amounts to no more than twenty
minutes. Dennis Quaid picks up another fat paycheck as an overconfident former
race car driver for NASCAR but lacks the energy to pull off the role
convincingly. Brooklyn Decker is just another pretty face while the rest of the
male cast including Ben Falcone and Rodrigo Santoro end up being written as totally
clueless schmucks, victims of their wives crazed and obsessive antics.
“What to
Expect When You're Expecting” will be released on May 18, 2012 and has so far
received largely negative reviews with 30% on Rotten Tomatoes. I doubt it will
stray far from this number by the end of the week. Films like this are
relatively inexpensive to make and despite competition from “Battleship,” “The
Dictator,” and box office juggernaut “The Avengers,” it should turn a decent profit
due to the lack of female-centric fare in theaters right now. I managed to
obtain tickets to an advanced screening of the film and as expected, much of
the audience leaned toward female but what was shocking is that there was
actually applause once the end
credits began to roll. Has standards really fallen so low? Honestly, I’m
inclined to say yes given the current popularity of trashy literature such as E.
L. James’ Fifty Shades of Grey…but
that is a topic best left for another time, perhaps when the film adaptation is
released. Unfunny and full of clichés, “What to Expect When You're Expecting” is
an ill-conceived film packed with stereotypical characters and manufactured
drama that fails to meaningfully explore the difficulties that women face
during pregnancy and childbirth. You might as well just go see “The Avengers”
for the umpteenth time.
Final
Rating: 2 out of 5
“I
just wanted the glow. The one that they promise you on the cover of those magazines.
Well, I'm calling it—pregnancy sucks. Making a human being is really hard. I
have no control over my body or my emotions.”
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