Rated
PG (Some Mild Action and Rude Humor)
Running
Time: 1 Hour & 32 Minutes
Cast
(voice)-
Dane
Cook-Dusty Crophopper
Brad
Garrett-Chug
Teri
Hatcher-Dottie
Stacy
Keach-Skipper Riley
Roger
Craig Smith-Ripslinger
Priyanka
Chopra-Ishani
Carlos
Alazraqui-El Chupacabra
Julia
Louis-Dreyfus-Rochelle
John
Cleese-Bulldog
Cedric
Antonio Kyles aka Cedric the Entertainer-Leadbottom
Gabriel
Iglesias-Ned/Zed
David
Adkins aka Sinbad-Roper
Val
Kilmer-Bravo
Anthony
Edwards-Echo
Colin
Cowherd-Colin Cowling
Oliver
Kalkofe-Franz/Fliegenhozen
Brent
Musburger-Brent Mustangburger
John
Ratzenberger-Harland
Directed
by Klay Hall
 |
| Parents, you will be suckered into buying this toy for your kids. |
Note: Screened on Tuesday, August 6, 2013 at AMC Loews Orpheum 7.
'I'm
all about makin' that money,' remarks a blinged out James Franco in March's
"Spring Breakers," director Harmony Korine's subversive ode to American
materialism and excess. Well, Disney is all about makin' that money too. How
else would you explain the existence of "Planes"? An official spin-off
from Pixar's "Cars" franchise, the animated film began life as a direct-to-video
release from DisneyToon Studios (they're responsible for all those needless sequels
to Disney classics that clutter your local video store) but it received a theatrical
upgrade last December when early footage impressed studio executives at Walt
Disney Pictures. More likely, they saw dollar signs after the "Cars"
films brought in over $10 billion in merchandise sales. In fact, a "Planes"
sequel is already set for release in summer 2014. Given all the toys that parents
will be suckered into buying for their kids over the holiday season, a series
like this pretty much pays for itself…in billions. Although "Planes"
isn't as bad as I was initially dreading it to be thanks to some nifty aerial
sequences and energetic voice acting, it doesn't change the fact that the film
is nothing more than a shameless, corporate cash-grab.
Living
in the sleepy town of Propwash Junction, Dusty Crophopper (Dane Cook) spends
his mornings dusting crops at the local cornfield but he dreams of one day becoming
a world-famous air racer despite being repeatedly told that he'll never be fast
enough. With a little encouragement from his best friends Chug (Brad Garrett) and
Dottie (Teri Hatcher), Dusty enters the 'Wings Around the Globe Rally' and manages
to defy all odds by just barely earning a place in the competition. To prepare,
he convinces crotchety war veteran Skipper Riley (Stacy Keach) to train him but
is unable to overcome his fear of heights. Skipper works around this and soon Dusty
joins the other racers, which include stuffy British champion Bulldog (John
Cleese), Indian flyer Ishani (Priyanka Chopra), amorous Mexican El Chupacabra (Carlos
Alazraqui), French-Canadian Rochelle (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), and the villainous Ripslinger
(Roger Craig Smith), in New York City. The intense competition takes Dusty all around
the world, from New York to the Himalayas, and he quickly becomes an underdog favorite
in the race in spite of his extreme acrophobia. As he comes to realize his true
potential, reigning superstar Ripslinger attempts to sabotage the little crop-dusting
plane's chances in order to secure the prize for himself.
In
his own review, Drew McWeeny of HitFix humorously summarizes the press materials
for "Planes": 'We started work on this as a direct-to-video quickie, but
it looked nicer than we expected, so we decided to squeeze out a few bucks in
the theater first.' It sure must be demoralizing at DisneyToon Studios given that
almost all of their releases (a whopping sixty) are blatant cash-grabs. Every
classic Disney film from "Cinderella" to "Tarzan" has had
one or more direct-to-video sequel or prequel from them. With children eating up
anything these days, it shouldn't come as a huge
surprise that a film like "Planes" exists. Directed by Klay Hall (a
former supervising director for the television series "King of the
Hill"), the opening title card bizarrely reminds us that the film takes place
in the 'World of Cars' even though
it's been plastered on every poster already. While Pixar wasn't personally
involved in the project, the person responsible for coming up with the initial
concept was none other than John Lasseter, the director of the original "Cars"
and its much-maligned sequel. Lasseter retains a story credit here (in addition
to executive producer) but the screenplay was written by Jeffrey M. Howard,
whose previous work consists of all those endless "Tinker Bell"
movies hogging up store shelves at your local Toys 'R' Us.
Either
way, it doesn't matter who came up with what or who wrote the script because
the plot is generic to a fault. It's the same damn underdog story that's been
told countless times already, more recently in DreamWorks Animation's "Turbo."
Several elements of "Planes" are recycled from the "Cars"
films, with Propwash Junction standing in for Radiator Springs and Skipper Riley
replacing Doc Hudson. Hell, they even went so far as to make Dusty Crophopper
sound like Lightning McQueen! There are some amusing bits, largely stemming
from El Chupacabra's repeated attempts to get into Rochelle's plane engine but does
the film have to rely so much on broad ethnic stereotypes? It downright borders
on being offensive at times. To pad out the running time and add some 'drama,' there
are some superfluous subplots surrounding Dusty's ironic fear of heights and Skipper
hiding a secret from his past yet it ultimately changes nothing: "Planes"
is a lazy endeavor designed only to sell toys…and lots of them.
When
you're watching an animated film that's clearly made for kids, your mind tends
to wander and you start questioning the logic of the world that's being shown.
For one, why does Dusty need to water the crops if there are no people to eat
them? Who's inside of all those commercial airplanes at the airport? How do all
these vehicles even reproduce? Do they just bang their engines against each
other? As you try to unravel the logic of these films, it starts to dawn on you
that the only way "Cars," and by extension "Planes," makes
sense is if you conclude that all this is taking place in some post-apocalyptic
future where humans somehow don't exist anymore. That being said, the CG animation
at least reminds you that some effort went into the making of this film. Sure,
it lacks the detail and technical prowess of rival animation studios but it does
capture the thrill and freedom of being in the air with its various aerial set-pieces.
The highlight is when Dusty finds himself trapped in a thunderstorm in the middle
of the Pacific. Unfortunately, the 3D adds little to the experience and actually
turns all the colors into a dull shade. Considering the film's subject matter,
the added effect represents a missed opportunity.
The
voice cast is loaded with celebrity talent and includes Stacy Keach, Brad
Garrett, Teri Hatcher, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Priyanka Chopra, John Cleese,
Cedric the Entertainer, and many others. Even though it's obvious that this is
only a paycheck gig for them, they at least managed to inject some life into
the film and kept it from being a total bore. As Dusty Crophopper, Dane Cook doesn't
do much besides mimic Owen Wilson's voice and the sole piece of inspired
casting comes from Val Kilmer and Anthony Edwards as two Super Hornet fighter
jets, a clever, if obvious, nod to 1986's "Top Gun."
Released
on August 9, 2013, "Planes" has received overwhelmingly negative
reviews with 24% on Rotten Tomatoes. Critics noted that it 'has enough bright
colors, goofy voices, and slick animation to distract some young viewers for 92
minutes—and probably sell plenty of toys in the bargain—but on nearly every
other level, it's a Disney disappointment.' Honestly, who was surprised by this
reaction? Coming into an already crowded summer, some box office analysts
believed the film would earn as much as $30 million but at this point, most
families are probably burnt out on animated fare so a final weekend gross of $20
million is a more reasonable estimate. Still, Disney is already laughing their
way to the bank with all the merchandise they're going to sell. Ultimately, it
doesn't matter what critics like me think of "Planes" because
children will love it regardless of what we say. This was clearly evident at
the advance screening. At least it can take solace in the fact that it's better
than "The Smurfs 2." That has to count for something.
Final
Rating: 2.5 out of 5
"It
ain't how fast you fly, its how you fly fast."
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